
I sit down with comedians, Matthew Broussard & Ari Shaffir. We talk about Matthews brain, his new special, confrontations, judaism, and much more! Check out Matthew’s new special “HYPERBOLIC” on YouTube here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5UECGG-CD88&t=226s Check out Ari’s special “America’s Sweetheart” on Netflix Follow Matthew YT: https://www.youtube.com/@mondaypunday IG: https://www.instagram.com/mondaypunday Follow Ari YT: https://www.youtube.com/@arishaffir IG: https://www.instagram.com/arishaffir --------------------------------------------------- Sponsors: Helix Sleep - Go to https://helixsleep.com/bert for 20% Off Sitewide Robinhood - To receive your 3% boost on annual IRA contributions, sign up at https://robinhood.com/gold Magic Spoon - Get 5 dollars off your next order at https://MagicSpoon.com/BERT. Liquid I.V. - Get 20% off your first order of Liquid I.V. when you go to https://www.LIQUIDIV.COM and use code BERT at checkout. BetterHelp - Get 10% off your first month at https://www.betterhelp.com/bert Manscaped - Get The Beard & Balls Bundle for 20% OFF + Free International Shipping with code “BERT” at https://Manscaped.com! #ManscapedPartner Cigars International - Visit www.cigarsinternational.com/BERT or use code BERT at checkout for 20% off PLUS free shipping on your entire order. --------------------------------------------------- SUBSCRIBE so you never miss a video https://bit.ly/3DC1ICg For all TOUR DATES: http://www.bertbertbert.com For Fully Loaded: https://fullyloadedfestival.com For Merch: https://store.bertbertbert.com YouTube▶ http://www.YouTube.com/user/Akreischer X▶ http://www.Twitter.com/bertkreischer Facebook▶ http://www.Facebook.com/BertKreischer Instagram▶ http://www.Instagram.com/bertkreischer TikTok▶ http://www.TikTok.com/@bertkreischer Text Me▶ https://my.community.com/bertkreischer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Chapter 1: What is the main topic of this episode?
This episode is brought to you by Shinedown's Dance Kid Dance Tour featuring special guests Bush and Morgan Wade. Shinedown's Dance Kid Dance Tour kicks off July 19th at Boston's TD Garden and makes stops at some of the most iconic venues across the country. This is Shinedown's biggest tour yet featuring Second Chance.
sound of madness and all the classics you'll love alongside some of the never before performed deep cuts and of course the mind-blowing production empire the band is known for and i am telling you i've seen that firsthand we saw them on tour the whole our whole group saw them and it was one of the most amazing shows and if you are one of those people that's lived under a rock and are unfamiliar with shine down check out burt cast number 623 they play acoustic i'm telling you zach
is what they call a prodigy guitar. He is amazing. He is brilliant. And by the way, they're bringing Bush with you. Are you kidding me? Morgan Wade? This is a night you're not going to want to miss. For a full list of dates and to secure your tickets right now, visit shinedown.com. Hey, guys. My new special, Lucky, is streaming on Netflix March 18th.
So what I'd love for you to do, if you don't mind, go to Netflix, set yourself a reminder to watch Lucky March 18th on Netflix. I hope you enjoy it.
Oh!
Did he floor you? I was crazy. And this isn't the environment for that kind of behavior. That was an ultimate moment on this show.
It was the greatest moment I've ever had in a show ever. Aperol spritzes. Have you ever had an Aperol spritz?
Oh, yes. My fiance's go-to.
For real?
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Chapter 2: What insights does Matthew share about his new special?
I mean, yeah, they're only five bucks, but they're fucking going to be fun.
It's hard to get... It's not the price. It's just it's hard to get my guy to mail them to me and all that. Yeah. But like I... I don't think they're looking for acid, especially not in that quantity.
See, that's where your brain works. And I go, you're right.
It's risk or war, right? The ratio of risk to penalty. The penalty would be super high, but the odds that they would find it and then test it. And it's like, if they found it, I could swallow it. I could go like that with my hand and now it's gone. With these two things? Yeah. It would disappear with the pocket lint in my pocket.
Yeah.
I think.
But see, I wish I had your brain. One time I was starting to smoke weed and my dad was like, Or Leanne was like, just take it with you on the road. It was healthier for me to smoke weed than to drink. Or if I drank and smoked weed, the second I smoked weed, I stopped drinking. Interesting. Yeah, if I smoke weed, the second I smoke weed, I'm done drinking.
And Leanne said to me, just take it on the plane with you. And I was like, no, I'm weird about rules. I go, the rules are you're not allowed to. And she goes, baby, worst case scenario, they find it, they arrest you, you got a great story. And I was like, yeah, but I'm breaking the rules. Like I'm not allowed to break rules. Like I didn't get a tattoo because my dad would never let me.
I didn't have a fake ID because my dad would never let me. I drank and drove like maybe like a handful of times as like a kid because I was like right around the corner. Like I never did it like – you know, drinking and driving. As a grown man from 18 to 52, I maybe, and Pete, back me up on this. I maybe one time have had a drink and gotten behind the wheel.
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Chapter 3: How does Matthew's brain work in relation to comedy?
can be a source of support for any area of your life. It's time to shift the focus from doing it all to knowing that we're better when we ask for help. I remember Joey Diaz told me that. You know, you never think you get Joey Diaz. I was going through some stuff and we were having coffee every day and he was like, you know, this will help. And then one point he's like, man, you might need therapy.
He's like, you know, the stuff we talk about here, maybe highlight it and bring it into therapy. It was the truth, man. I got into therapy and everything started to fall into place. Therapy is amazing. And if you're thinking about starting therapy, do BetterHelp is your only option. It is fully online, making therapy affordable and convenient, serving over 5 million people worldwide.
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You ever get in like an Uber or sit down with someone and they just start talking and you're like, you're not good at this. And I'm paid to do this. Yeah, you're one of the best in the world at it. This guy is just some schmo. Yeah. And then they just take over. Like, if you ask me one question, I swear I have some good stories. Okay, now I'm going to interrupt, okay?
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