The Emotion Few Talk About, But Many Feel
episode
The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
57 min
5 speakers
8 chapters
transcribed 4 months ago
Transcript
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Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
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What are the basics of shame and its impact?
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Welcome to The Curiosity Shop, a show from the Fox Media Podcast Network.
I'm Brene Brown.
And I'm Adam Grant.
We're glad you're here.
What does recent research reveal about humiliation?
Absolutely.
What are we talking about today? Okay. We're going to talk. I'm going to tell you a really quick, funny story. We're going to talk about shame.
How is humiliation defined and understood?
Oh, I've always wanted to talk about shame.
Have you?
Yeah. I have a ton of questions for you about it.
Why do people struggle to outgrow feelings of shame?
Okay. This is a really funny story. When we were, when I was first doing the shame research, this was probably 20 something years ago, we were running a group in a domestic violence shelter, piloting a curriculum. And like the third group we ran, the self-nominated leader came up and said, I've met with everyone in the group. We have a proposal. And I said, okay, great. And it's always good to know who the emerging leader is in a group situation. And she said, we don't like the word shame. And I was like, oh, that's going to be tough because it's a shame resilience group. And she said, we would like to moving forward say shame instead. And so for the next nine weeks, when people would be sharing or when I'd be talking about it or the co-facilitator, who's actually the clinician, I was the researcher, you know, someone would say, listen, I was so, that really put me into some really deep shame.
What strategies can help individuals overcome shame?
And so, yes.
That's hilarious. So you take the shame out of shame by mispronouncing it.
Yeah. You know why? Because just the word shame can elicit, it's got a contagion to it that's hard for people.
I can absolutely see that. Can you see that? Yeah.
How can one reconnect their brain after experiencing shame?
I mean, frankly, I mean, did you see what happened to the Michigan football program last fall? Oh, yeah. Anybody. I grew up in Michigan.
In what ways is shame connected to imposter syndrome?
I went to grad school there. A lot of my family went there. I've been a diehard Wolverine fan forever. And it's hard not to escape the feeling of shame there. But we won a national championship. So I'm feeling a little better.
You did win the natty. Congratulations.
Thank you.
What a slugfest game.
It was not.
Against UConn.
It was a little ugly.
Yeah, it was a little ugly, but congratulations.
Thank you.
I will proudly say, go... Is it this? Michigan, is this the sign?
I've never done that.
Oh. I don't know. I'm big into the signs of the mascots. So we're going to talk about Charmé.
All right. I'm ready.
Okay. So where do you want to start? You want to start with the basics? You're the shame expert. Yeah. I mean... Yeah, so I always start like with a one, two, threes. One, we all have it. Two, no one wants to talk about it. And three, the less you talk about it, the more you have it. So I am thinking about doing, again, this was two decades ago, doing grand rounds and- At a hospital. At a hospital, psychiatric department. And afterwards, the head of the psychiatric department came up and said- This is the first conversation I've been here for 30 years that we've ever had on shame. And it's the number one presenting issue we deal with. No one is talking about it. And at this exact same time, I was having my PhD students do a content analysis to see in all of the primary texts that are adopted across psychology, social work, counseling.
How much are we talking about shame? And at that time, which again, it would have been 1998, we found one chapter and it was written by me in 70 texts. Wow. Yeah, this is one of those things that we have become very slow to talk about because of the contagion of the word itself. So when we talk about diagnoses or we talk about issues, we can find some comfort in us and them, but there is no us and them in shame. To be alive, you know it.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:01–0:21
2
What are the basics of shame and its impact?
0:21–0:46
3
What does recent research reveal about humiliation?
0:46–0:53
4
How is humiliation defined and understood?
0:53–0:57
5
Why do people struggle to outgrow feelings of shame?
0:57–1:48
6
What strategies can help individuals overcome shame?
1:48–2:04
7
How can one reconnect their brain after experiencing shame?
2:04–2:13
8
In what ways is shame connected to imposter syndrome?
2:13–57:52
Speakers
5 identifiedMore from The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
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Brené Brown on Protecting our Attention, Time, and Humanity in a World that Won’t Slow Down
Can We Build an “Us” Without a “Them”? with John Green
Leading Under Pressure with Rebecca Lowe