Napoleonic Warfare is Rock Paper Scissors | Austerlitz & The Peninsular War (Part 6/10)
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What is the rock‑paper‑scissors analogy for Napoleonic land warfare?
Uh Whoo Hoo
And that was five parts leading up to Trafalgar, and now we start five parts leading up to Waterloo.
Yeah.
Welcome back to Finn vs. History. I'm joined by Horatio Gould. It's part six. Fellas, prostates out. Fold get them out your arse. I don't know what that means. Big
sock.
We need to take your prostate's out of your ass, pink socket, have a look at it and put it back in. We've done Trafalgar because we're now embarking we're right. This is the thick of it, right? We there could not be thicker.
Yeah.
In a this is the midst. There's musket fry.
My
prostate's fucked. It's imploded. I've been my I don't piss anymore. It falls out. Right. It dribbles out because I've been reading through the battles that we're going to encounter this episode.
It's about more what you cut out than what you leave in, really. I
last night I went through it all. I motivated my tome.
Fellow school shooters.
He won them all.
Yeah.
Fellow school shooters, hold your Napoleon tome so
fellow fellow.
Hold your Napoleon's.
I don't think many people have said fellow school shooters because it's not much of a community.
Fellow school shooters. No, that's the problem with school shooters. And do they
identify as school shooters? I don't know if they I think they'd v view themselves as like vigilantes or like fighting for justice. I don't think that it's like, yeah, I'm a school shooter.
No, it's just that it's the it's like the word Jew. It can be a It depends
which how much stank you put on it. Yeah, exactly. School shooter.
I'm a school shooter. We're a community of school shooters.
Yeah.
Uh fellow school shooters, hold your Napoleon tome high. Put your right hand on it. Uh get your penis out. We're going to go through the battles of Napoleon Central Europe. Okay? This is a big one. Last chance, ladies, go away. To recap, uh Napoleon and his his his fleet has been defeated at Trafalgar. Sure. The French Navy is effectively destroyed. Nelson is dead. Right. But fear not.
He's given up on C Napoleon. That's all, that's over. Doesn't matter. Yeah.
Fuck it. I don't care. Yeah. The army that was amassing at Bour Bourgon, that was about that was waiting for the channel to be cleared, they've turned around and he's gone, Fuck it. Yeah.
Let's go the other way.
Totally. Right. We
we we had we had plans that the invasion exists in a book and that's it basically.
So we're going east. Now, before we get into these battles, I would like to cook for a while on Napoleonic land warfare. Please. Because we've only really talked about it uh in the naval. The forum is yours. The naval s the naval sets. They're not the forum is yours. The assembly hall is mine, I've got a gun. Uh barricade of the door shut. Right. Okay. So you're gonna listen to my manifesto and then I may let you leave. Alright? That's that's how we're doing this. So, um no now Napoleon, of course, had introduced mass conscription. One of the first people to do that. That is why he is so dominant, is that he's got so many more men. But Napoleonic warfare on land, uh as you've said before in this series. Is so enchanting to men because it's uh essentially we can all understand how you do it.
Right. Because it is basically just chess.
Yeah. Very
simplistic
chess. It it's satisfying because it's penetrable enough that you will fill in the gap saying I would have done that as well.
I know why he did that and so I could do that.
Well I would have done that. I will do that. Because it's obvious. I will I'll show them all tomorrow at school. Because when you read it, it makes it sound like it was obvious. Yes. So it was nice thinking, Well, I would have thought of that as well.
But also when you're watching the animations with the arrows, which I was last night and Amanda went to bed long before I started doing that, uh, this is where the arrows actually make sense. When you get to World War Two, it's a fucking mess. You can't you can't see what's going on. So Napoleonic warfare on land is a triangle. Yep. Cavalry, artillery, infantry. Right. And it's a bit like rock, paper, scissors. Okay? In that you're trying to some things beat other things, right?
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Chapters
7 chapters
1
What is the rock‑paper‑scissors analogy for Napoleonic land warfare?
0:06–4:31
2
How did Napoleon’s mass conscription give him a tactical edge?
4:31–14:01
3
Why was the Battle of Austerlitz a masterclass in encirclement?
14:01–22:43
4
What role did terrain and the mist play in Napoleon’s Austerlitz plan?
22:43–32:32
5
How did Napoleon’s personal quest for an heir affect his campaigns?
32:32–43:08
6
What was the Continental System and why did it fail?
43:08–54:56
7
How did guerrilla warfare change the Peninsular War?
54:56–1:00:33
Speakers
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