Episode 661: The Miseducation of Ed Larson - Cryptids 101

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Last Podcast On The Left 1h 14m 5 speakers 8 chapters transcribed 4 months ago
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What are cryptids and why are they fascinating?

Ben Kissel 0:01
There's no place to escape to. This is the last podcast. On the left. That's when the cannibalism started. Who's that?
Unknown 0:16
Yeah, no, but it was truly a wonderful time. It was a great time. But yeah, I was saying one of my alligator buddies got bit by a crocodile.
Henry Zebrowski 0:25
It just shows it's real. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, this is a crocodile bite.
Marcus Parks 0:30
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Unknown 0:32
Luckily, it was a really small crocodile, and it only ripped one tendon, so everything's going to be okay. He's already back. They said that he went to the hospital. They pushed, like, the tendon inside of him. They put him in a boot, and he was back at work that night. I was like... The crocodiles are going to live. Yeah, dude. You don't got to get right back in there. I think by that point, we're like, maybe we can take a break. They've been around for millions of years.
Marcus Parks 0:54
It's those animal people, man. It's that badge of honor.

How do personal experiences shape beliefs in cryptids?

Marcus Parks 0:57
They want to get hurt and then be able to go back to work. Like, yep, I got bit by a crocodile. Back at work, two hours.
Henry Zebrowski 1:03
Just be like, nobody cares that you're bragging.
Marcus Parks 1:04
Yeah, it's the same thing with my father. The same shit.
Henry Zebrowski 1:07
You're the only one who knows.
Marcus Parks 1:08
You know that, right?
Henry Zebrowski 1:09
You're the only person who knows that you're doing this to yourself. Days off are allowed. This is what really is a workplace injury. And you know what else is good? You need it? It's like friends and family and other people might know you. You might want to leave for a second. I'm almost kind of jealous.
Unknown 1:25
I don't think I can get a workplace injury.
Henry Zebrowski 1:27
No. Well, you can get a workplace injury.
Unknown 1:29
How fat do I have to get to get a workplace injury here?
I know.
Unknown 1:33
You know, Eddie, honestly, it's getting shot outside. Oh, yeah. If I'm outside, I'm fucked. You guys have plenty of ground.

What is the significance of the Mothman in folklore?

Unknown 1:41
If I'm on the sidewalk, I feel like that's Burbank territory.
Marcus Parks 1:45
If he's on the sidewalk, I ain't paying for shit. No, of course not. No, no, no.
Henry Zebrowski 1:48
But all you'll hear is like, Mr. Lawson. That's how you know it's coming. And the man shoots you through his trench coat. He's like, please, do it on property. He's like, just drag my body over there.
Marcus Parks 2:00
Welcome to Lost Podcast on the Left, ladies and gentlemen. My name is Marcus Sparks. I'm here with Henry Zebrowski, the cold capitalist Henry Zebrowski.
Henry Zebrowski 2:07
Yes, all I think about is exceptionalism. everywhere i go as you can tell obviously because i flipped our humble little network here into an absolutely massive business empire oh yeah yeah we're rolling in it how does someone make this money
Marcus Parks 2:33
We have the man who wants to eat himself out of a job but has the strength to not do it. It's Ed Larson. That's right.
Unknown 2:40
I want to thank Mark here from Alaska for sending me all these canned fish.
Ben Kissel 2:46
You know what's really great about getting all this?
Unknown 2:48
This is going to help me get sick. If I eat this and get sick, is that a workplace hazard? No. If I didn't ask, would it have been? Yeah.
Henry Zebrowski 2:57
It's a marketplace hazard.

What are some famous cryptids and their origins?

Henry Zebrowski 2:59
See, thank you sending this to Alaska before we went to Alaska. We're going to Alaska in the morning. Tomorrow. I'm going to Alaska, but this will allow me to remember Alaska when we're home.
Unknown 3:10
You know what would be great? I'm actually just going to put all of this in my backpack and then pretend like I bought it for Julie.
Okay.
Henry Zebrowski 3:19
I brought you seven jars of fish. You know what? Wives, if there's one thing I know wives love, is jars of smoked fish. Love it. Ladies can't get enough of. They love the smell of it.
Unknown 3:37
Looking at this, it really does make it hard for me to not... open it right now and eat it. But I won't because I respect you.
Henry Zebrowski 3:43
It will devastate this room. Yeah, it'll devastate. Probably upstairs as well. Yeah, very much so. So 100% full disclosure. Total transparency here at LPN. We love disclosure here at LPN. Yes, I love that film. Demi Moore.

How does the concept of cryptids relate to psychological phenomena?

Henry Zebrowski 3:55
Mmm. Now, I want to be clear with you that we had a series that we were just about to do. We had a two-episode series we're going to do, and we're going to do it still.
Marcus Parks 4:04
Eventually. We're definitely going to do it. I mean, right now I'm looking at my laptop, and I certainly have tabs open for synonym psychotic and synonym unpredictability.

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