Relaxed Fit: The 4th Annual* Last Podcast On the Left March Madness of Murder

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Last Podcast On The Left 1h 12m 7 speakers 7 chapters transcribed
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What is the significance of the March Madness of Murder?

Unknown Speaker 3 0:01
There's no place to escape to. This is the Lost Podcast. On the left.
Markos 0:09
That's when the cannibalism started. Who's that?
Andrew Zubowski 0:21
Ladies and gentlemen, are you ready? Are you prepared for the madness and mayhem? Welcome to... to last podcast on the left. And we are here at the depends adult diapers for men center outside of downtown Croatia. And it is a beautiful day for a fight. Isn't it market?
Marcus Parks 0:41
That's right. This is the fourth annual last podcast on the left, March madness of murder and mayhem this year. We've got a damn good surprise for everybody this year. It's going to be an old wild card edition.
Unknown Speaker 3 0:56
That's right, man. We got the broswers pumping. We got the popcorn popping. And we got the crack in the light bulb. That's right. We are having a time here in Croatia.
Andrew Zubowski 1:08
And I hope everybody's enjoying their hot dog made from real dog. It is one of the essential delights here in downtown Croatia. And do you think that we got a stern wind coming out of the northeast about 45 miles per hour? Do you think that will affect the gameplay today, folks? Yeah! Well, we'll have to get that one contestant off the rankings. All right, here we go. Goodbye.
Ben Kissel 1:31
Mitch McConnell. Unfortunately, we forgot that in Croatia, the wind blows with powdered glass.
Andrew Zubowski 1:37
Yes, it's actually a perfect environment. These contestants, some of these people have never been in a physical fight.
Ben Kissel 1:43
Absolutely not.
Andrew Zubowski 1:44
Some of them have been in so many fights, you would consider them to be the most dangerous person around. But that's why... We bring them in here today. Isn't that correct? We are doing it in an all dirt field.
Ben Kissel 1:55
That's right. And here on the wild card edition, I know in previous years on the March Madness of Mayhem and Murder, we've done half fictional and half real. But this year, we only got a couple of fictional people in there because this is a wild card edition. I'm very, very excited to see how this shakes out.
Andrew Zubowski 2:11
And I am filled to the brim. I think it depends. I have blood in my diaper. Oh, you might want to get that checked out of it.
Larsa Pippen 2:20
Nah.
Ben Kissel 2:21
I like your cavalier attitude. Welcome to the last podcast on the left, ladies and gentlemen. I'm Marcus Parks.
Andrew Zubowski 2:26
Hey, I'm your commentator, Andrew Zubowski, and I'll tell you, my wife's going to divorce me because I'm too good of a husband.
Ben Kissel 2:33
And, of course, had Larsa.
Unknown Speaker 3 2:35
How you doing, folks? I'm just here to have the ham and make sure the whale stays in.
Andrew Zubowski 2:40
I actually did forget I was going to bring prosciutto today. I forgot it. Well, tomorrow is another day.
Ben Kissel 2:48
Yeah. Let me ask you. Am I bleeding right now? No. Okay, good. No. Because it tastes like blood. Yeah, hey. That's just your mouth. Yeah. I got a cold sore, and then when I was doing my announcer voice, it ripped open. What?
Andrew Zubowski 3:02
Wow, it's a cold sore, but it looks hot.
Larsa Pippen 3:05
Yeah, wow, sexy.
Andrew Zubowski 3:07
Apply your sports bandage.
Ben Kissel 3:11
Ah, very good. Yes, Rob has handed me our sports bandages, a.k.a. paper towels. The quicker, thicker, picker-upper. That way I won't be self-conscious about bleeding from my mouth.
Andrew Zubowski 3:21
We want to say thank you to our big sponsors over at Brawny. They could absorb, you know that just one square of Brawny can absorb up to four ounces of infant blood.
Henry Zebrowski 3:31
Yes.
Andrew Zubowski 3:31
And that's why brawny is the number one paper towel of abortionists everywhere. That's right. No tampon, no problem. Jam yourself up full of brawny.
Ben Kissel 3:41
You big lumberjack. And I also wouldn't mind getting a sponsorship from Orogel. Oh, certainly. Because I am quite open about cold sore use and cold sore, you know, suffering. Maintenance. Yeah, maintenance. So, yeah, just Orogel, if you need a sponsor, if you need a pretty face, hit me up. But it ain't too pretty because it's got a cold sore on it.
Andrew Zubowski 4:00
Hey, what's the point of having it if you don't? He earned it, though.
Ben Kissel 4:04
Yeah, I did earn it. Yeah, I did earn it. You'll take a paste, Orogel. Please. But yes, here on the March Madness of Murder and Mayhem, this is our fourth one. And what we're going to be doing today is we're going to be picking 16 fighters out of our cup of champions. Oh, here we go.
Andrew Zubowski 4:26
Let's get our first round going.

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