Side Stories: Blaming Bears
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What happened with the Arkansas doctor and workplace conduct?
there's no place to escape to this is the last podcast on the left side stories that's when the cannibalism started side stories yes Well, I got to say, buddy, a little disappointed. Yeah. You backed out of your stripper promise. Honestly. No show the party and said no stripper is coming. Listen, I did. Tootsie still had a decent time. I saw. I saw the footage. She still had a decent time. I had to go outside. I shaved a cat. And she was fucking mad. She was like, what is this? No, I didn't mean to disappoint Tootsie. For those of you that don't know, last week we were discussing about how it was Tootsie's 17th birthday party. That's a dog. 119 dog years. Yes, it's a dog, by the way. It's not a little girl that we were talking about this for. Who would name their daughter Tootsie?
A big old person with a metal rod sticking out of the side of their head. You never know. Voters? I had a, but I wanted to, I wanted to get a stripper. And I did, I have my guy, Dominic. Dominic? He's like my neighborhood naked guy. Okay. And he was going to go do that. And I was like talking with him about it. And he was totally down. He was totally chill. But then the next thing you know, he did commit suicide by police officer. Oh. So he could not be there. Was he dressed as a stripper cop?
Yes.
Unfortunately, he was dressed as a sexy police officer. And then he was pulled over for reckless driving because he was a sexy, intoxicated police officer. And then in his actions, he was then murdered.
By Eternal Affairs.
Yes. Not by a normal street cop. No, it was just some other guy that didn't even want to deal with him. He was off duty. Yes. When he had to shoot him in the head. No, that's not true. I just fucked it up. I didn't do it. But I will say. Tootsie's mad. I know. I know. Tootsie's mad. I'll have to just wait six months before she's in the grave. That's unfair. It is unfair, but it's probably true. She's very sweet, and I love Tootsie. She's very sweet. I can't believe every day I'm like, is today the day? She is. It's her and Jimmy Carter. Yeah, yeah. Just continuing to, I guess God forgot about me. God must have forgot I was here. She has outlived everything that she's ever come in contact with. Dude, she's like... She was from Barack Obama's presidency. Yeah. That's amazing.
Yeah, no, it's truly unbelievable. It's amazing. But I did receive many emails that I thought were so funny. Do you know... So you even got... Information from strippers? No one was local. Okay, no one was local. Yeah, you can't be flying them in. No, no, no, no. Not right now, okay? It's hard. It's called trafficking. There's a lot of conferences. There's a lot of real people really thinking about this. Only fuck local. That's it. That's it. Keep it. Side stories. This is Side Stories. I'm sitting here with Ed Larson. I'm Henry Zabrowski. How you doing? But I got several emails from exotic dancers of the male persuasion that they said not only is it not hyper unusual to be asked to dance for a dog, but several of them have already danced for dogs. Oh, so we're not even original. No. They have walked into a room. They said largely did seem to be obviously an excuse for the women. Oh, they didn't find out until they got there. Oh, no. No, no.
They rolled in. Several of them walked in. I feel like you've got to say it ahead of time. There's a dog in a chair in the center of a bunch of horned out cougars. And that dog is just sitting there and they're like, all right, it's Pepper's ninth birthday. You got a date for her. And then this man is just getting groped by a whole pack of women. Dog, no interest. Yeah. You know why? Because he wasn't smuggling pepperonis. Well, if you tie a treat to their penis... And then have that and see if he can make his dick bounce. You know the trick where they get hard and they make their dick bounce? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we tie a treat to that and then make it bounce like that. I mean, you could definitely get some interest.
I feel like on some way, that's got to be demeaning to the dancer. Put some eyeballs on your balls. No. And so we can look it in the eyes.
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Chapters
7 chapters
1
What funny insurance scam involves bears?
32:24
2
What bizarre event happened with a mother and VR?
0:01
3
What happened with the Arkansas doctor and workplace conduct?
0:01–32:24
4
Why were four men charged in a staged bear costume incident?
32:24
5
What unusual creatures were smuggled on a plane in Peru?
0:01–50:09
6
How are bears and crime related in this episode?
32:24
7
What are the funniest moments discussed in the podcast?
0:01–50:09