Why Is It So Hard to Look Foolish? Play, Vulnerability, and Being Fully Yourself | Ep.300
episode
PLAN GOAL PLAN | Goals, Transformation for Women, Mindful Time Management, Balance, Working Moms
21 min
1 speaker
8 chapters
transcribed 1 month ago
Transcript
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Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.
Why does play feel risky for high‑achievers?
Play requires you to be bad at something, to not know how it ends, to look a little foolish in front of someone. And if you are someone who spent your whole career being the person who has it all together, who anticipates, who does it right, y'all, that's terrifying. Play asks you to drop the thing that made you successful. So today, Ryan and I are getting honest about the risk and the vulnerability buried inside something that's supposed to be fun. and the ways that we've each had to learn, sometimes badly, about how to be okay looking foolish in front of each other and others.
Let's do this. Welcome to Plan Goal Plan, a podcast where ambition meets balance. I'm Danielle McGue. I'm a professor, speaker, mom, recovering overachiever, and self-leadership coach for high-achieving women. At the intersection of research, practice, and play, I discovered a path to planning and goal-setting that's bold, balanced, and sustainable. Together, we'll reclaim your time, empower your goals, and create a life where you thrive at work and at home. Grab a pen. Let's get started.
So this month on Plan, Go, Plan, we've been talking about play. And I think that we are both incredibly playful people. Would you agree? Oh, absolutely. Goofy, some might describe us as. Goofy. How are you goofy? Tell me how you're goofy. Oh, I think I'm just silly. I think sometimes in professional settings, I'll maybe come off as a little bit serious. And then all of a sudden, I'm like, I'd do something really ridiculous or that's a clear rules violation. And I just like being silly. I like to bring that energy at home with the kids. I don't think this, you and I, would work if we weren't both a little bit silly. I just feel like that's part of the dynamic here. Absolutely. I know that I've shared this story with you, but for those of you listening, hey, I'm so excited that you're here.
It's someone whose embarrassment button is a little broken. I am very comfortable being embarrassed or doing what other people might find embarrassing. And I distinctly remember dating someone maybe my first year in college who was
How do Ryan and Danielle describe their goofy personalities?
was mortified by my comfort with doing embarrassing things. Now, some of that would be, I tend to dress somewhat playfully. I like really bright colored, funky clothing. I remember at the time I had a pair of yellow polyester pants that made him cringe. And it wasn't until after we broke up and reflecting on things, I was like, I don't want to be partnered with someone who is embarrassed by me and is constantly monitoring my behavior so as to save me from embarrassment. So yeah, I don't know if you remember that or... I do. That's how I knew. I just had to lean into the goofing. That was actually your tactic. You're like, I'm going to win her over by being... By just being a big weirdo. A big weirdo. Okay.
How do you see play enriching your life? Oh, I think that play and fun and humor and all those things I think fit together. Also, if I guess it depends how we define play, but I think if you think about play is like things that you would do for the joy of doing things that are just fun for their own sake, not for some sort of instrumental purpose. I think both of us have a lot going on professionally, a lot of big things that we're trying to do. And I think that's probably a hard space to spend all day, every day in. And so making sure that you have space to do something that's just, that's not aimed at some goal down in the future, but it's just, what are we going to do in this next hour that's just going to be fun and awesome?
That's awesome. So you mentioned before that in work context, you are oftentimes really serious, but then you might have a moment of playfulness and people are sometimes confused or respond differently. How have you navigated that sort of tension there in the workplace? I guess I would say that I think most people have little bits of silliness to them, and they've maybe just been told to not let that show up at work. And so I think part of it is just in giving people permission to let that out themselves too, right?
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
Why does play feel risky for high‑achievers?
0:00–2:06
2
How do Ryan and Danielle describe their goofy personalities?
2:06–5:33
3
What story reveals how embarrassment can shape a relationship?
5:33–11:30
4
Why did a pair of yellow pants become a turning point in dating?
11:30–13:23
5
How can showing silliness at work give others permission to play?
13:23–16:44
6
In what ways does play improve workplace collaboration and creativity?
16:44–18:51
7
What is the ‘holiday spider’ and how does it illustrate family play?
18:51–21:22
8
What final tips do the hosts give for infusing play into daily life?
21:22–21:34
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from PLAN GOAL PLAN | Goals, Transformation for Women, Mindful Time Management, Balance, Working Moms
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