The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya
A Public Service Announcement for Our Fans with Trixie and Katya
25 Mar 2025
Chapter 1: What does Aura do for identity protection?
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I'm in my boudoir. Hardly a stitch of clothing on me. Gross. Body is wet. Dripping. I'm worried about the floor. Wet from bottles. I'm click clack and I carry Bradshaw on the computer and I notice... It's not on. It's not on.
It's dead for years. It's a keyboard that's not attached to her. A keyboard that's taped to a typewriter. And it's not paper.
It's toilet paper fed through.
And you just keep writing. And I noticed something that seems a little suspicious. perhaps even fraudulent. So I go, I click like, I don't recognize this transaction. We do a little, we flag her. We flag her. And then not 12 minutes later, I get a phone call from Bank of America. And they say, there is some fraudulent activity on your account.
We just want to make sure that these transactions were. Oh, shit. So she puts me on hold. Quite a while, actually. Kind of a bitch move. No hold music, I notice. You might be being robbed. This is very urgent. Can you hold? Yeah, hold. Would you mind holding? What was the hold song? Marvin, there was none. That was the first flag. No Michael Buble. There's that one really sexy one that's like...
What about some soft jazz? Where's my music? Right. Where's the sacks? Where's the, where's the like a magic 106.7. Where's the, where's the Michael Bolton? Where's the, how can we be lovers if we can't be friends, non-vocal arrangement, you know, none of that. And then she comes back. She's asking me some more questions.
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Chapter 2: What happened during Katya's bank fraud experience?
The things that are, you know what I mean? Things of that nature. It's a grooming thing. Taking your lashes off? Why don't they just chop your dick off? Why don't they give you breasts? It's just, I mean, what are we doing here? It's 2025. We don't know. What are we doing here? It's perplexing. I love it. Straight guys are so fucking shook and weird.
I know. I saw this.
Wait, wait, wait, wait. Let me interrupt. Please let me interrupt you because I saw this clip of Andrew Garfield on Colbert. And did you see that clip of them kissing? No, I don't know what the context was, but this is how it came up is like, do you feel that? Obviously they were talking about some role and he was like, do you feel uncomfortable kissing guy?
And Andrew Garfield's like, no, of course not. And then he's like, do you feel comfortable kissing guys? No, not at all. And then they start fucking kissing and I'm sorry. Did you get horny? I got fucking horny.
bricked bricked that's so gross b-r-i-q-u-e-d you're like one of those no no no no no no no no no you're like one of those sad little straight guys who like your two girls kiss you're like that's you yes that is me but also no but you know what it was you know what I witnessed in that moment you know what went through this little noggin you know Walton Goggins what happened I thought these are two men who are so comfortable in their identities that they have nothing to lose that they're gonna give a little titillation for the girls let's take a break
It was cunt. You got to pull up the clip. It was cunt. I don't need to watch porn. No, no, no, no, no. I'm telling you it was, I know, I know exactly what they were doing and I know why they were doing it and they pulled it up really well and I'm happy they did. And I don't think there's anything wrong with it, but it was hot. It was hot. I'm sorry. It was hot. Okay.
It was just like a nice gesture of like no homosexuality and you had to stick your weird little coil dick in it and try to make it some kind of weird porn experience. You had to just piss all over something so beautiful and normal. I had to drag myself to the cock room with my corkscrew cock.
You're like one of those people who watches two girls chatting in the locker room and then you're like, oh, now they're going to turn les for my entertainment.
Kissing another man.
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Chapter 3: How does Trixie feel about public interactions with fans?
I'm just like, you're going to leave the country because of one guy with dyed hair plugs and a laminated face.
A laminated face. That is what she looks like. She's given face down on the copy. Yeah, it's crazy. Dress for the job you want.
And she desperately wants to be in Madame Tussauds House of Wax.
Laminated. Laminated. And his nasty ass apartheid mom. Girl, I can't with them.
She says, why are people so afraid of a guy who can't fight his way out of a wet paper bag? Laminated face. That's probably what I look like today. Laminated face. That's like when the girls, the older gays, just get the lasers constantly. And there's still a lot of the discoloration, but everything's wet. Wet plastic bag.
Yeah, you know what I fear? I have a fear of... You know this look, and I don't want to... I don't think I can steal anybody out that we know, but it's the aging Palm Springs kind of clutching to youth, maybe has a bit of money kind of guy, maybe wears clothing for the age group that's like 20 to 30 years younger. No, I know. Do you know what I'm talking about? Yeah.
I don't... You know, like roids probably, a lot of tanning, stretch, pumped. The purple chest. Yeah. It's just... Some of these gay guys' chests have been.
It's a look. The sun damage is. It's wild. The chest skin, the color is rum raisin.
Yes. And it's, yeah, it's also like, it's like, it's like a hide. It looks like a hide. It looks like a hide. A tanned hide. And it's just, oh, I don't know. And it's the surge. It's that, it's that like old Palm Springs cat lady gay guy face that I'm just like, oh, I don't know.
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