The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya
All Hail the Flying Spaghetti Monster with Trixie and Katya
Tue, 18 Feb 2025
I believe in one god, the Noodle Almighty, maker of marinara and meatballs, of all pasta visible and invisible, born of the semolina before all ages, fettuccine to fusilli, ravioli to rigatoni, bucatini to capellini, begotten, not overcooked, perfectly al dente, topped with parmesan for our salvation, he came down from heaven, and by the spirit of a stripper, touched his noodly appendage to her, thereby creating a beer volcano, in accordance with the scriptures. He ascended into heaven, and is seated at the right hand of the garlic knots. He will come again in glory, to judge the hungry and the full, and the unlimited breadsticks will have no end. I believe in the Divine Carbohydrate, the lord, the giver of life, who proceeds from tomatoes and garlic, who has spoken through the prophets. I believe in one holy book of tortellini. I look forward to the resurrection of the rotini, and the life of the almighty acini de pepe to come. Amen. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at https://BetterHelp.com/BALD and get on your way to being your best self! You’re going to love Hungryroot as much as we do! For a limited time get 40% off your first box PLUS get a free item in every box for life by going to: https://Hungryroot.com/BALD and use code BALD If you want more space, more privacy, a better location, and the most loved homes, check out https://Airbnb.com or download the Airbnb app today! Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatyalive.com To order your copy of our book, "Working Girls", go to: https://workinggirlsbook.com To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Chapter 1: What is the Flying Spaghetti Monster?
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If I was like, honestly, one of my favorite games to play, if it's like we have no board games or trying to spend time. The celebrity.
Yeah.
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Chapter 2: How do dating apps contribute to disconnection?
Very beautiful movie. But I keep seeing the girls. Superstar. Yes, superstar. And the dolls and the girls keep walking in. I said, you every morning... God is taking a potato peeler and just, yeah, it's that thinner kind of thing. Well, you know what?
It's tough for me because like a lot of the, um, it was not, I mean, a lot of the celebrities whom I don't know, but just see online, it gives tweaker. Like it's, it's, it's almost, it's very tweaker because it's that gaunt,
a hollow kind of look like immediate like rapid weight loss off often is like you look like a marathon runner and that's not a compliment right marathon runners look like they are moments from death yeah is like is it the ozempic or is it the pookie or both why not both why not both and then some of the people on it are the thinnest people we know wow they were already the thinnest people i know and they're like i just couldn't get that extra five pounds it's like that sounds like an eating disorder but hey
What do I know? Hey, let's keep it light. Back to everything being shitty. I'm too cheap. I can barely take my arthritis medicine. If I had to do two injections a month or whatever. Wait, it's an injection? Arthritis medicine? No, I know that. Of course. I thought it was just a pill. No, it's the stabber. It's the auto injector. Well. Well, shit. You still doing the simian or whatever? Simsian.
Simsian. Yeah. The sibian? Yeah, I ride on that thing and I just, yep. Just vibrates my eyeballs out of my head. Hog to hell. Blake comes over and he's helping me with my back, which he only had 30 minutes and I said, I'll take it. Oh, he can do stuff in 30 minutes. He comes over. We don't talk at all. Okay. He's like, you know, we haven't seen each other in six months.
And I was like, we don't have time to talk. We'll catch up. He goes, we'll catch up next time. He's working me out. He's breaking the bones. I'm yelling on the mat. I'm going, ah, and he goes, well, you're not as bad as your friend. Cause he said that when he's adjusting you, you're the screamer. Well, yeah, I'm very vocal. I'm very vocal. I'm very vocal in all, in every regard.
Do you do sex vocals? Yeah. Yeah. I do kind of. I do too. It's got to have a rhythm. No, I mean, I, I'm a moaner. If it's good. So you're back. Yeah. So Blake's helped me with my back, which is wonderful. It's still hurt today, but like it's a process, right? So Blake's helped me out. I forget where this program is going.
Oh, I had to pee the whole time, which I just, I had to pee before the yoga started. Oh no. And the whole time I had to pee. That's the worst. The worst. But I didn't want to stop in the middle because I'm like, we only have 30 minutes. But it was, it was very nice to, he made time in his schedule to come help me. It was very, very nice.
Well, you know what I did today that I'm not going to do tomorrow? Pee in the shower at the gym. That's a confession. Why did you do that? Because I had to go so bad. And I just let it rip. And I apologize. Don't you think people are going to smell that? That's what I thought while it was happening. And then I was like, this is wrong. Were you in the shower? Yeah. Was someone else in there?
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