On today’s episode, we hear about: · A wife trying to overcome her feelings of guilt following a painful divorce · A man wondering if he should go back to living in his car · A man unsure how to support his best friend after a devastating diagnosis Next Steps:📞 Ask John a question! Call 844-693-3291 or send us a message. 📚 Building a Non-Anxious Life 📝 Anxiety Test 📚 Own Your Past, Change Your Future ❓ Questions for Humans Conversation Cards 💭 John's Free Guided Meditation 🤘🏼 The Dr. John Delony Show Merch Connect With Our Sponsors: 🌱 Get 10% off your first month of BetterHelp. 🔴 Get 15% off with code DELONY at Bon Charge. 🌿 Get up to 40% off with code DELONY at Cozy Earth. 🔒 Get 20% off when you join DeleteMe. 😇 Go to Hallow for a 90-day free trial. 💤 Visit Helix Sleep for special offers! 🥤 Get 20% off with code DELONY at Organifi. 💪 Get 25% off your order at Thorne. 🏋️ Go to Trainwell to get started! Explore More From Ramsey Network: 🎙️ The Ramsey Show 💸 The Ramsey Show Highlights 🍸 Smart Money Happy Hour 💡 The Rachel Cruze Show 💰 George Kamel 🪑 Front Row Seat with Ken Coleman 📈 EntreLeadership Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Chapter 1: Why did the divorce happen?
Yes.
Do you feel horrible that you were worth more than putting your head in the sand? Do you feel horrible that you don't trust yourself because you knew for all these years what was going on and you chose not to do anything about it? Because I think you feel horrible, potentially. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe it's all about pornography. I just don't think so.
You violated your own moral compass when it comes to pornography, fine. And you're allowed to feel guilty. Guilt is a good emotion. It signals us when we have violated one of our own internal values. And if that's a value you violated, cool. Feel guilty. But don't you dare peg the collapse of your marriage on that one thing. Similarly, flip it around.
If he was looking at pornography, which would put him 90 plus percent of all men in America, and you cheated on him eight different times with eight different men. If you looked at him and said, hey, this is your fault. Come on.
Yeah. I know in reality, like I can see, I can see that writing on the wall and I do know you're, you're right. I think I just, I know it's going to come up as my son grows up and I know that he's, my ex-husband is very angry with me and I know that his family.
Hold on. Why? I think you're so blinded by the gas lights. They're so bright. He cheated on you eight times. He had sex with eight different people. Yeah. Call me crazy. That is a different level of betrayal. In my book, it is.
It is.
It's a cosmic different level.
He said it was me stepping out ultimately on him as well because I wasn't wanting to be physical with him because I was scared of him. I didn't know who he was with. Therefore, I wasn't wanting to have relations often with him at all. Hold on.
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Chapter 2: How to cope with feelings of guilt after divorce?
Thanks for the call, sister. Coming up next, we talk to a man who is thinking about being homeless again. Okay, it's time for a quick word about Delete Me. Does anyone else feel like our digital footprints are starting to feel more like digital trails leading people right back to us?
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Chapter 3: What is the impact of pornography on relationships?
And, uh, I've just, um, during that time I've just been doing like little odd jobs, like little things on Craigslist that people need, need done, uh, driving DoorDash, like just any, any little thing. And, um, uh,
During my time in, like, software sales and stuff like that, I would just, like, I would go to work, get up at the same time, and, like, kind of just grind it out to be able to, like, you know, keep the lights on, pay rent, and stuff like that. And I don't really have that high of standards. I don't really need a whole lot.
So, like, I just, I've been in the state of mind right now where it's just, like, Like, okay, like, like, like you get up and do all that. Like, like why you don't, you don't need it. And sure.
And it clearly don't like, uh, I was gonna say like that same thing applies for you right now with, with lifting weights. Like why I'm not playing football. I'm not in college athlete. I'm not fighting anybody. Why in your 60 year old self, whose hip has degenerated. And I've got to do 40 years with artificial hips or I can't move. And my health has fallen off a cliff.
Is going to say, man, I wish you had have. And so you're right. Doing the calculation right now, you have no responsibilities and you have no purpose. And so when you are absent those two things, which by the way, this is a cultural issue. This is not an Asher issue, man. So I'm not coming at you. Like you are, you are asking the questions that everyone should be asking right now.
the job market is chaos they told us a bill of goods going to college is going to solve all of our problems that if you just get this degree and you probably listened a job in stem cool great and exactly what i did yeah you're like this sucks i keep getting laid off i keep getting fired i keep look whatever um
I'm just going to tell you right now, the greatest gift you could give 27-year-old Asher, the greatest gift you could give 37-year-old Asher, the greatest gift you could give 77-year-old Asher is not stuff. So the question about should I live in my car, I could give you all the data on how your amygdala functions in an unsafe environment. It feels cool to take a two-week vacation and go camping.
I would never recommend anyone pack up and move to the woods. Right? That comes at a cost. But what you felt was a... You've been living in a failure factory for the last five years since you graduated college, and it just felt good to opt out for a minute. The greatest gift you could give yourself, your 27-year-old self and on, is to go find a squat bar and get under it.
And I'm not talking about a weight room. The greatest gift you can give yourself is responsibilities. The greatest gift you could give yourself is purpose. And you don't have either of those things. responsibilities to a young adult, to somebody in their 20s and 30s, is the weightlifting for your mind and your body and your spirit.
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