How to do a good quickie
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What are the essential elements of a satisfying quickie?
He can use his fingers, he can use a vibrator, he can use his mouth, whatever he wants to use. But if you want sexual pleasure then you are welcome and and entitled to demand sexual pleasure. And I suppose a quickie doesn't always have to be intercourse, right? Totally. You can have fingers, you can have oral, you can just have touching, you know, s you can sit on wherever you want, uh, and it it'll be fine. So sexual activity is a menu. There's so many things that you can pick on the menu, so many courses, cuisines. Warning. Adult content.
The hookup love and on Triple J. Have you ever been in a situation with your partner where you're about to head off somewhere, but you got a couple of minutes to kill, so you think? Hey. Why not have a quickie? If you don't know what you're doing, then you might leave a quickie feeling unsatisfied. Well, sex therapist Chantel Otten is here to help. I wish the listeners
could see the big smile on my face because I'm I'm a really big fan of quickies. Um and I definitely think they're great for spicing things up a little bit. Um, but also if you've got some mounting sexual tension with your with your partner or or someone that's not even your partner, it's a really great way to get that uh dopamine hit and and to get the bonding experience but also to just have fun and uh I mean life is about pleasure and go for it.
Yeah, well I mean obviously like as you're saying it's it's a whole lot of fun. Um even if you can't necessarily um get there in time or or you just have a little bit of time for some fun. Is it worth going for? Like is it worth bothering?
Yeah, I mean Everything so I always say that foreplay starts from the last time that you orgasm or I mean if you haven't orgasmed in a while, just start at the start of the day and continue it through. If a quickie is not I if the goal of a quickie is to orgasm and you need to reach that and you don't, then you might be disappointed. If you can just focus on having a quickie for pleasure and the bo uh you know, maybe an orgasm is a bonus. Go for it. Just have fun. I think the the most exciting part of a quickie is the excitement and the fact that it is a quickie. You where are you doing it? Is it in a bathroom? Is it a you know, is it at a family function? Is it at a party? Is it a pub?
How can you choose the right sexual activity for a quickie?
Like what are you What is it at a a you know, a convention or work? Go for it. Have fun. Uh, be safe. Hopefully the doors are locked. Um, and if you're in your car, definitely lock the doors because you don't want anyone joining you. Um but But uh quickies are wonderful and it's always just good to get some skin on skin action, to get some feeling going on, some heavy breathing and uh yeah, uh just some fun. Are there any cons to a quickie? Like Yeah, I I definitely think there are cons, but I think it really depends on the relationship. So I n think that well, I know that a lot of people go, Well, why don't we just do it quickly? Because they're not really into having sex or they don't want to have sex with their partner, so they kind of disguise a quickie as, you know
this is gonna be a very sa uh sexually satisfying experience for the partner and I don't mind I'll just be a starfish. I'll go along with it. That's not really the the pleasurable type of quickie. It's not something that I really um encourage and if if you are one of those people then go ahead, go get some sex therapy. We're not bad people, we're really nice, we're here to help your sex life and um we're all gonna have sexual problems at some point. So uh Uh don't feel shame going to see someone about it. Um, are the cons of a quickie? Mm. I don't know, you might get caught, but is it is that a con? I mean it's a good way to see how you go with making excuses or uh weaving your way out of a situation that's a bit sticky.
I mean I mean, yeah, absolutely. I think like the main appeal of a quickie in particular is not just oh great, we can get a little more sex in before our day, but it's the the thrill of it I suppose.
Totally. And I o if I see a couple that are feeling like their sex life is a bit vanilla or a little bit beigey, then I say, why don't you switch it up a little bit?
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What are the essential elements of a satisfying quickie?
0:00–2:19
2
How can you choose the right sexual activity for a quickie?
2:19–4:48
3
What are common cons of quickies and how can you avoid them?
4:48–7:31
4
How does mindfulness improve quickie performance?
7:31–9:23
5
Where are the safest and most practical places for a quickie?
9:23–11:25
6
How can you ensure your own pleasure when your partner is focused on finishing quickly?
11:25–13:25
7
Why is being present the key to a great quickie?
13:25–16:01
8
What final communication tips guarantee a successful quickie?
16:01–17:59