Ep. 42: What Does Dysregulation Look Like?
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What is dysregulation and why does it matter for autistic children?
What's up everyone and welcome to Making the Shift.
We're an SLP couple from California with three boys and a passion for finding better ways to support autistic kids.
I'm Chris. You might know me as speech dude. I'm a Neurodivergent High School SLP and the creator of the Dynamic Assessment of Social Emotional Learning, and I specialize in crafting neurodiversity affirming IEPs through my online course.
And I'm Jesse, a sensory integration trained SLP, owner of a top-rated clinic in Los Angeles, and the creator of the Inside Out Sensory Communication Programs for Parents and Therapists. Join us weekly to learn neurodiversity affirming ways to support social, emotional development, and regulation in autistic kids.
Are you ready to make the shift?
Do it. Disregulation. So what does it mean exactly? So let's talk about what dysregulation looks like. And the thing is that It can vary so much. Not all two kids are the same. Not even one child may look the same all the time. So there are a lot of things we want to think about. And I think that. These are just kind of a few buckets I've broken it down into to help you kind of get an idea of what dysregulation might look like, different things to think about. And our first is thinking about their body.
How can a child's body language reveal signs of dysregulation?
What are they doing with their body? What is going on with their body? And I think it's really common that people think dysregulation looks a certain way. Like they think um a child who is always on the move, go, go, go. Is dysregulated, which that is a form. And they may think of dysregulation and think of a child like tantruming or something on the floor, another form, of course. But there are also other forms and other ways that your child might show that they're dysregulated. So, first of all, having a very high level of energy to the point where it's too distracting for them. They're constantly on the move, constantly seeking that sensory input. And that is a state of dysregulation because when we have too much energy, we are not going to.
be in the place where our body is calm and and regulated and engaged and attentive. Okay. But we can also see the opposite where we see kids who have a much lower level of energy. That kid who just seems like really chill. kind of you know more passive wandering around a child with low energy doesn't necessarily just like sit down in one place all day they might still move around but it's just gonna be like slower or more wandering kind of movement and it's kind of like The the kid you meet where you're just like You're just like, hi, are you listening right here? Hello. Right. And sometimes you might do that to like your significant other in the morning.
What energy‑level extremes (high or low) indicate dysregulation?
Like they just wake up and they're kind of in that groggy state where they haven't fully gotten to the state of alertness yet. You can't talk to them out about your plans for the day or anything like that. So you think about like your partner, you're waiting for them to get to that point. And for your child, it's almost like they're kind of in limbo where they're awake, but they're not like fully regulated. They're not fully alert yet, not fully engaged. Something else you might think about when you think about a dysregulated child is their stress responses, right? So you guys are probably familiar with our stress responses, which are fight, flight, freeze. And those are all states of dysregulation as well.
So when we think about fight, we think about kids who are trying to like whether it's like push us away, they want to get away from us. So they're gonna push us away. We might um get bit, they might pinch us, they might, right? What happens when our kids like can't fight anymore? Right. That next step might be flight. It might try to be get away from here. And sometimes that's kids' first response to stress because they might realize. I'm the little person here. I can't fight all these people, but I could try to get away. Okay, so trying to flee, trying to get away is definitely a stress response we see in kids who are dysregulated.
How do fight, flight, and freeze stress responses show up in kids?
And another one is freeze, which is essentially them just shutting down.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is dysregulation and why does it matter for autistic children?
0:08–1:36
2
How can a child's body language reveal signs of dysregulation?
1:36–3:15
3
What energy‑level extremes (high or low) indicate dysregulation?
3:15–4:48
4
How do fight, flight, and freeze stress responses show up in kids?
4:48–6:41
5
In what ways does dysregulation affect a child's communication?
6:41–8:06
6
Why might a dysregulated child shift between talking, scripting, or silence?
8:06–10:03
7
How do emotions manifest when a child is dysregulated and how can we support them?
10:03–10:54
8
What practical steps can parents take to create a safe space for regulation?
10:54–10:56
Speakers
2 identifiedMore from The NeuroAffirm Podcast
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Ep. 123 Not Seeing Progress in Speech Therapy? Start Here.
Ep. 122 Screen Time Considerations for Autistic Kids
Ep. 121 The Biggest Sensory Mistakes SLPs Make
Ep. 120 Why Anxiety is So Common in Autism (And What Actually Helps)