Ep. 93 Four Powerful Strategies to Support Emotional Regulation
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
What's up everyone and welcome to Making the Shift for Autistic Kids.
We're an SLP couple from California with four boys.
And we're here every week to bring you neuroaffirming tips, tricks, and tools. Are you ready to make the shift? Let's do this!
Hello, hello, and welcome to Making the Shift. I am back in my office today and I do have a fun little visitor here, the little baby. is six weeks now and maybe a little more at this point. He is sleeping, but he is talking while he sleeps. So you will very likely be hearing him while we are here. If this is your first time here, welcome. I'm Jesse Ginsberg. I'm a speech language pathologist and I own a clinic here in Los Angeles where we see several hundred kids a week. And if you are coming back for more, then welcome back. Today we are talking about something that It's such a hot topic and it's something that is so misunderstood by so many people, which is why I wanted to bring it up. I posted on social media about chewing because something I hear so often is what do I do?
This kid is chewing, he's chewing through all of his clothes, he's chewing through his pencil, his shirts come back ruined and ripped and soaked. And then what happens is a therapist says, Oh, I know what to do. Let me give this kid a chewy tube. And then when the kid doesn't actually use the chewy tube and the and the chewing doesn't go away on the clothes and on all of the things, they're like, I don't understand what's going on here. I gave them a chewy tube. But here's the thing. Oftentimes, and I will not say always, and I will not say for everyone, but oftentimes chewing is actually the result of emotional dysregulation. And what happens is so often our emotional dysregulation can manifest in a physical way.
For instance, we see the child chewing and we assume, okay, this is a sensory need. I need to give them sensory input. Okay. And it's not to say that. sensory input doesn't help kids emotionally either because of course, you know, it can.
Why does an adult’s emotional state affect a child’s regulation?
But in the case of chewing, a lot of times what I see is there is something going on under the surface, some type of big emotional dysregulation, and the chewing is just not getting to the root of the problem. So today we are talking about how you can support a child's emotional dysregulation because that was the number one question I got after I posted that video was, okay, thank you for helping me identify that now what? Now what do I do? So today I'm giving you four powerful strategies that you can use for emotional dysregulation and to support your kids that you are working with or your own children. All right. So we are gonna go through four of those today. So Here we go. Number one. And I'm sorry to tell you this.
I know you don't want to hear this, first of all. Okay. I'm sorry, but I gotta say it. You have to regulate yourself first. Okay, so it doesn't matter if there's a child who's dysregulated and you're trying to comfort them in the moment, or if the dysregulation happened another time of day and you're trying to come back to them and talk to them about it later. You have to be regulated first. We need our kids to feel that calming presence from you. A dysregulated adult cannot regulate a dysregulated child. I've said it a thousand times, I'll say it again. A dysregulated adult cannot regulate a dysregulated child. Okay, so it could be as simple as Taking a couple breaths and I hate saying that because it's so cliche, I'm sorry, but it could be a second uh as m as much little as taking a
Couple breaths before addressing the child. Okay. And what helps me, because as you guys know or may may not know, you'll know now. I have five boys at home. Eight and under. And there's a lot of moments where something happens and I feel dysregulated. And even if I take that second to realize I'm dysregulated, that helps me. So taking a second instead of like jumping up. to get there as quick as possible. Realizing I'm dysregulated. Thinking about it for a second and then going in. And sometimes it's as simple as that, giving yourself just a little bit of extra time.
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Chapters
4 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:08–2:16
2
Why does an adult’s emotional state affect a child’s regulation?
2:16–7:13
3
How can you model self‑regulation for your child before trying to help them?
7:13–13:17
4
What is co‑regulation and how does it create a safe space for dysregulated kids?
13:17–16:39
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from The NeuroAffirm Podcast
Ep. 125 How to Run Successful Social Groups
Ep. 124 Building Rapport Isn’t Enough...How Therapists Become Part of the Intervention
Ep. 123 Not Seeing Progress in Speech Therapy? Start Here.
Ep. 122 Screen Time Considerations for Autistic Kids
Ep. 121 The Biggest Sensory Mistakes SLPs Make
Ep. 120 Why Anxiety is So Common in Autism (And What Actually Helps)