“Never Say That In Bed!” Abbey and Peter REACT To The Wild Fulham Trend!
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What funny banter kicks off the episode in the barn?
There's amazing kisses you can have.
We can't. We've got to kiss each other for the rest of our lives.
The first one's the worst one. Do you think there's a kissing expert out there?
You're looking at her.
Maybe I need a few more lessons later, eh? Pedro and Gaz might like it, but Avi will probably be sick. We've got up the spurs, up the pompy, up the reds.
Up the arse. If you said to me to say any football club during SEX, I'd be like...
Give us a robot pee.
I don't know if filth comes out of my
mouth. LAUGHTER
Hello and welcome to The Therapy Crouch. You asked me anything with me, Abby Cunsey.
Me, Pete Crouch. And me, Gaz. How are we, guys? Good.
All good. Back in the
barn.
Back in the barn. I like the barn.
I like the barn. I like the barn as well. I like what you've done with the place. You've got some more feng shui behind you.
Well, no, this is not our barn. This is Karis's barn.
I know, but I like what she's done with it. Yeah, it's a friend's barn.
Why is Jack demanding a Phil Foden zig‑zag buzz cut and Wayfarers for his tuxedo?
I like what she's done with it. You've got a nice little plant behind you there, Pete. Yeah,
it's good.
Oxygenating the room.
I like it. Kind of getting out of our house and going to work. Do you know what I mean? Because there's always stuff going on at our house, isn't there? Like, people everywhere. Dogs and stuff. Kids. I
know. I know. I wish the kids weren't coming to the wedding. It's so annoying.
I thought you were going to say that. You have shown me a gag the other day of two people saying, would you like a couple? Would you like kids? And then the wife goes... I don't think I do. And then the husband goes, I don't think I do. And then they're sitting down and the kid's going, kids, we've got something to tell you. We don't want you.
We don't want you anymore.
But you know, unfortunately, we're tied in now, aren't
we? It's a no kid wedding. Apart from our kids. I can't believe it. We've been majorly stitched,
massively stitched up here. How's that happened?
Oh,
because they're walking down the fucking altar the aisle they're heavily
involved in it all
yeah I just don't want them there at all I just want to because everyone's going to be you know I love going on holiday and having a lie in which we've never had in the past 15 years but like we're going to be so hungover and like up at 6am with those little
yeah monkeys yeah just it's such a great wedding isn't
it like there's a lot
of great fun people going fantastic and um
we're on the facetime to a lot of our relatives last night like everyone's so buzzing together yeah yeah
yeah Let's be honest, right? You know, it will be amazing having the kids involved. Like, it will be amazing.
I mean, mum's going to do absolutely sweet FA. She'll be like, hi, kids! Like, and just leave them.
Does an unconscious “I love you” spoken in sleep count as a real confession?
She wouldn't go, you young ones crack on now and have a nice time. I'll take the kids home.
And it's a two-dayer, isn't it? So the next day with the hangover, the kids will be up at the crack of dawn, I
imagine.
Yeah, which will be good anyway. I mean, it takes us out of
the...
And Pete's ruined the whole wedding. He took Jack to get his hair cut. Oh, yeah? He's got a Phil Foden with zigzags in his bloody...
It's a cracker. LAUGHTER It's
an absolute cracker. The buzz cut was bad enough with his tux because I loved his long hair. Now he's got a buzz cut, an earring and a Phil Foden with the zigzag and a gold chain with a medallion on. He's
rebranding himself, isn't he? In a massive way.
he's got his own what was the trainers
like I had to say no to him I said mate I usually facilitate his individuality yeah like he is an individual he's like he's got his own style and I love that
I love
it I'm like yeah you can have that
red leather jacket he's so confident in his own skin I heard
him saying it the other day, like Johnny was like, because I was saying we were in the shop and I wanted him to get a pair of trainers. I was hoping for just plain white trainers. Yeah. Going to get him some Nike white, just all plain white. And the
stuff they were
going for, Johnny was like, I want these. I was like, mate, you cannot. I can't have a son that wears them. Sorry.
Jack wanted a leopard print.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What funny banter kicks off the episode in the barn?
0:00–0:51
2
Why is Jack demanding a Phil Foden zig‑zag buzz cut and Wayfarers for his tuxedo?
0:51–2:46
3
Does an unconscious “I love you” spoken in sleep count as a real confession?
2:46–4:19
4
How did Pete’s candle‑lit Ibiza proposal go down and why was Abbey in wet hair and pyjamas?
4:19–4:56
5
What’s the story behind Abbey’s “I’m at the gate!” text versus Pete’s romantic “I love you” text?
4:56–5:45
6
Is saying the L‑word on Day Three too early, and how do reality‑TV love stories compare?
5:45–7:34
7
Are all the “firsts” (first kiss, first baby, first wedding) really over once you hit 40?
7:34–9:25
8
What’s the crew’s reaction to the viral “Up the Fulham” bedroom audio trend?
9:25–25:04
Speakers
3 identifiedMore from The Therapy Crouch
“The Real Reason Couples Split!” Kate Daly on The Silent Signs Of Divorce!
“You Left THAT In The Key Drawer?!” Abbey & Peter on Bedroom Secrets & Wedding Drama
Bridezilla or Justified?! Abbey’s Sister Elle & Scott on Pre-Wedding Chaos & Brutal Scandals!
He Practiced On His EX?! Abbey and Peter React to Outrageous Engagement Secrets!
Abbey’s Lawless Nashville Hen Do, Pete’s DIY Golf Course & The 2-Hour Bedroom Dilemma!
“That Is CORRECT!” Abbey and Peter REVEAL Bedroom Confessions, Bulging Discs & Keeping Score!