A Cosmopolitan Episode, YAH?: Monday, April 21st, 2025
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Who are the hosts of 'The Toast' podcast?
Morning girlies, it's the toast. It's Jackson, Claude, and we're your hosts. It's your favorite show, the fast five things you need to know. We'll start your day off swirly.
It's the toast. They sound amazing. Welcome back to The Toast and happy Monday. Today is a Pargy episode of The Toast, hosted of course by Turdy Lou Freebush and clearly my stalker, Miriam Webster, define stalker for me.
We're twin, we're both wearing Gargi Pargy set merch. We're not even like launching merch or announcing anything this week. We just both wore it on our own accord. That's how comfy, cozy and Pargy-lish it is.
It was an uncoordinated attack. Attack. You're constantly tapping me.
I actually wore this to dinner at Trouty's last night. So it was like, and it looked so cute. And I was like, let's run it back.
Oh, my God. What did you have for dinner? Officially Passover. War is over. We can eat bread again. And boy, did I eat bread again last night.
I had a hamburger on a bun, a small luxury that I had missed.
That you had taken for granted.
And then I didn't have anything else like incredibly leavened, you know?
But we've all year for that.
I have big plans for today. Sourdough, we're back.
I had pizza. I had pasta. I had chipriani cake. Now, my husband was in charge of the ordering because I was just so tired. That's how you know I really wasn't feeling well because I hate when Ben orders food. First of all, for some reason, whenever we use an Uber Eats or any sort of delivery service door dash on his phone, it doesn't come. Oh, that's classic my husband. I don't know what it is about his phone or his account. They get the worst everything.
Not only does he always either mess it up, even if it's not his fault, they just obviously don't respect him because they don't care to get it right.
No, and obviously I'm in really good standing with Uber Eats. I must be one of their top.
I'm in good standing as well.
.01 customers. I was actually told that the sushi place I order from, I am their top .01 orderer.
Everywhere I would order from. Well, because if I like something, I'll do it again and again. I don't do variety. So everywhere I order from, I'm the number one customer.
My app, I command respect. I get the best, most highly rated drivers. I get the quickest delivery times, best priority windows. So I just knew my dinner was never coming.
Same for when we order an Uber. Like if we order an Uber from Zach's phone, like we're not going anywhere. Worst cars. Worst cars.
But if it's my account, we get a limousine. We get a driver with a hat. You know, I'm obviously just like a priority customer for these platforms. And my husband is not.
I don't Uber a ton down here. But last time we Ubered in New York, I like called an Uber. And there was a car seat in there. Like he had an extra car seat. Like this is a driver who's prepared.
And I was actually with you when your husband tried to order an Uber. And like seriously, he was standing outside for 25 minutes.
What do you get, a pedicab?
Yeah, so obviously we are just like at different levels. But he did a good job except for the fact that like my husband has a real, real over ordering problem. And it was so apparent last night.
Okay.
So not only he went, he went a little nuts with like pizza and pasta, which honestly can be forgiven after, you know, a week of no bread. I understand why he got so many extra entrees. Like there was so much food. It was like an embarrassment of riches. But then he also ordered the Cipriani cake. Let me ask you how many slices of the Cipriani cake, which the slice is fucking huge.
It's a celebration too for two adults.
You would get two for $2. I can't even finish one slice. It's huge.
No, I know, but it's weird to just get one. What if you might be offended by that? You're eating for two. Two is safe.
1,000%. I'm like, you ordered four pieces of cake? And I was like, okay. This morning, I come into the kitchen. The two pieces of cake that went uneaten, he left them out on the counter. He didn't put them away last night. I'm like, so you ruined.
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Chapters
3 chaptersSpeakers
3 identifiedMore from The Toast
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