“Did you go to Zaro’s?”

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The Tony Kornheiser Show 1h 2m 8 speakers 6 chapters transcribed 1 month ago
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Unknown 0:03
Previously on The Tony Kornheiser Show.
Tony Kornheiser 0:07
This is so wonderful. This is what it said with the Henlope and sea salt. Relive your fondest beach memories with just one taste of Henlope and sea salt, a flaky, delicate salt that enhances all of the flavors of your cooking. Our salt is made by hand in small batches from water collected off the coast of Louisville. So let's be honest. This is ocean salt. Your memories are being smacked in the head by a big wave. Don't turn your back on the sea. Knocked down and the water rushes into your mouth and tastes terribly salty. Right?
Right.
Unknown 0:37
This is General George Washington, and you're listening to the Tony Kornheiser Show.
Tony Kornheiser 0:43
I'm not saying it's not good salt. I'm saying that when you talk about memories of salt, sea salt, ocean salt, that's your memory. That's all I'm saying. I have this haiku from Chef. A fine line between a face full of salt water and marketing schtick. Yeah, that's 100% correct. All right, so I played golf yesterday. I was terrible. I am now... I'm now terrible. I'm now a terrible player. I shot, like, a gift 98 yesterday, and when I reported it, I just said, just put me down for 95. And I shot way over 100. I doubled every hole that I did in triple. I was terrible. I don't... Is it affecting your enjoyment of the game? No, love the game. Love to play. Love. Love to play. But I don't love to play with... I shouldn't say I don't love to play with really good players because if they're chatty and they're funny and they play fast, then I do.
Tony Kornheiser 1:34
Sure. I just feel sort of embarrassed that I'm holding them up because I'm so bad.
Chris Cillizza 1:38
Is it an issue of grounding everything or you're just wildly all over the place in the air?
Tony Kornheiser 1:43
No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I hit the ball on the ground or I hit it thin on a chip and I go over the green. There's one shot on every hole that costs me two more shots. Do you know what I mean? I mean, I could hit three good shots, but then there's one shot that I end up with a seven.
Sally Jenkins 2:00
So when you're out of position, on your next shot, are you doing whatever you can to get back into position? Or for you, I feel like you're just having trouble getting into the shot. There's the part of you that's walking or riding with your friends, talking, sort of getting away from your life.
Tony Kornheiser 2:13
I'm so good at the range.
Sally Jenkins 2:15
I'm so good at the range.
Tony Kornheiser 2:16
You know, we were talking about practice. Anyway, it's not a game, but I was so happy. I was so happy to play. And we even played through a little rain. They let us take carts out. There was a little rain yesterday for about six holes. It rained never hard enough where you would say to anybody in the group, you want to go in? Like you want to keep doing it? It was, it was, it wasn't, you know, it wasn't, yeah, it was, it was there. It was consistent. But it wasn't awful.
Chris Cillizza 2:41
Now, the people you play with, are they shooting in the 70s or 80s?

What happens when Tony describes a terrible golf outing and why does he still love the game?

Tony Kornheiser 2:46
Well, they're shooting in the 80s and 90s. 80s and 90s.
Chris Cillizza 2:49
Okay, well, that's not. I mean, it's not like you're playing with people who are like scratch.
Sally Jenkins 2:53
They're playing with my own age. Right, but they had better golfing backgrounds. It's easier for them to just maintain a bunch of pars and bogeys without giving it all of their attention.
Tony Kornheiser 3:03
If I am totally honest and put everything out, I probably shot 115 yesterday. You're not even putting the ball in the hole? Well, I mean, I get close and I just say, okay. Winner rules. No, I don't continue. Between the legs? I mean, I just stop. Yeah, between when I go past by about six feet. That means it's good. Yeah. So I wanted to talk about something. And I feel that I have passed the threshold that I can talk about this. I left... The three-year grid of my life last Thursday for the first time again in three years because of the pandemic, because of COVID, because I am terrified of getting COVID, which isn't to say that I wear a mask all the time. It is to say I don't go anywhere. But you did go to a wedding in your defense.
Tony Kornheiser 3:47
But I didn't leave the grid of my life. No. What I'm going to say now will indicate to those new to the show that I've left the grid of my life.

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