your ex isn’t the problem, you are
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Why might you never get closure from an ex?
Maybe it's time to realize you'll never get closure. And that that person, they will never understand that they did something wrong. They just won't. It's not in their scope of reality. Maybe they're a little narcissistic. Maybe they just, they don't think your perspective is worthy. And in that case, maybe it's time to let go of that. There's a saying I don't think gets enough credit in our day and age. And it goes a little something like this. Well, you only miss the light when it's burning low. Only miss the sun when it starts to snow. Only know you love her when you let her go. Banger! Why have we not acknowledged that that is one of the best songs of all time? And also sayings. Because you only know you love somebody until you let them go. That's like some some real talk. No facts, no printer. And it's also something I think that I've struggled with in my life quite, quite heavily because I did not want to let them go. I wanted them to be a part of me forever.
I I liked I liked suffering. I liked knowing that I was hurt and knowing that they had hurt me and I had someone to put my blame on for the way I was mistreating myself. I knew that letting somebody go meant I had to own up to certain things. I had to acknowledge that I was not right and that I was goofy in the way in which I was approaching things. Well, who I was picking out of the orchard, the apple I was picking out of the orchard, right? I've talked about that, having a bad apple. Once in a while, you know, it'll sour the taste of the rest of them if you're not careful. But maybe right now you are in a position where you're done. No more. No more. No more, I don't want to think about them or think about him or her.
I just want to be at peace. That's how you know it's time to let go. But... This is not easy. You think that things in life will be as if you are playing peaceful mode on Minecraft. That is not life. Life is hard. It is long. And it makes you wonder how you are going to get through the little things, especially when everything piles up all at once, because that is always what happens. You think, oh, I mean, today was pretty chill. I went to noodles and company and I hung out with some friends. And then the next two days, it's like you are literally experiencing every emotion of grief. Everything is happening all at once. And you have a project that you have due at 1159 because you're still at school and you have to finish all of it as you're going through emotional turmoil.
It is just a lot, isn't it? All right, so let's calm it down. And let's look at this and let's really ask ourselves, okay, how do we know when it's time to let go? Right? How do we feel as if we're at our end in our grieving process? Because... you need to miss somebody. You need to feel as if, you know, you two had something and you have to sometimes grieve in a really, really uncomfortable and kind of sad way that you lost something that you put a lot of time and effort and love into. It's... You can't just expect not to do that. That's what comes with the risk of a relationship. And I have found that any time I've had to go through those kind of emotions and, you know, pick them apart, I have built myself into a better version of who I am every time. But it hurts. And it's painful. It's painful. Because in order to let somebody go, sometimes you have to realize that they were never someone who wanted you in the first place.
And that's really difficult when you already feel like there's not a lot of people that want you in the first place. And this felt special. And this felt like this person really had highlighted some of the features that you didn't see in yourself, some of the characteristics that you were so hard on yourself for. They loved that about you. And all of a sudden it's gone because there's a new person, because they've fallen out of love with you or they just, they never liked you. They liked what you gave them. They liked the attention. They liked the fact that they didn't feel alone with you, but they didn't, you were not their priority. It wasn't the reason that they were around you all the time. You were just, you were just there.
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