Dr. Alok Kanojia

No, ambiguity is exactly what's supposed to happen.

So if you think about what flirting is, flirting is...

It's a way to preserve plausible deniability.

It's a way to make you feel safe, right?

So if I am really – Andrew, I'm really interested in your body, bro.

But if I say that, it's – unless you are matching that energy, it's not going to be safe.

It's not going to be good.

It will ruin our relationship.

So flirting by nature is supposed to be missed.

So this is another thing where you're saying like, yes, there's ambiguity.

It could be interpreted this way and it could be interpreted this way.

That's not bad.

That's good.

That's how human beings actually interact.

So Winnicott described this beautifully because flirting is a form of play.

That's literally what it is.

And play is about a potential space.

When I'm playing like dolls with my daughter, it's not defined.

And the whole point is for it to be not defined.

So in that absence of definition, which now everyone is sort of like we're seeing a social skills atrophy.