Dr. Jared White

speaker

517 appearances 5 recordings 1 series first heard Jul 2019 last heard Apr 2021

Dr. Jared White’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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The Hook Up · When you feel ALL the feels in a relationship · 3 Oct 2019 podcast

But a second thing is that we can start to feel a bit disconnected in the relationship, right?

Like relationships are about connection.

And if we can't express the feelings that we have, then it's really hard to feel connected.

So we can be right next to each other in bed and feel worlds apart.

Absolutely.

I mean one of the things that some people really work well with is expressing it to others.

And if there aren't people in your life that you feel really can listen to the emotion or know how to or understand it or respond to it in the way that you're looking for, that's where professionals come in.

That's where you go and you speak to someone that that is trained in that sense.

Yeah, well I think it's gonna be a few different things depending on the relationship.

But there's a few simple ones that we can say maybe span all relationships.

One, we both have to express and feel validated, you know, we need to be able to express the emotion in a safe space where the other person's gonna listen.

Where uh people can say what's bothering them without it feeling like it's gonna come across as the other person thinking about how that affects them but can think about what is that person telling me about their emotion.

And I think one of the keys is that when people express emotion, the other person is so often quick to try and problem solve.

You know, we try and fix it.

We try and say, Okay, well you're feeling this, so if you didn't if you do this then you might not feel that or

Or if you didn't do this, then you wouldn't have felt that.

But what we're doing there is we're treating the emotion like it's a problem because we're trying to fix it.

And emotions aren't problems that we need to fix.

They just need to be heard and listened to and let be there.

Yeah, yeah.

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