Dr. Stuart Ablon

There's just things getting in the way sometimes. And when you're saying like, all these people that might piss you off, but how do I get them to change their behavior? I hate to say it, but they may be saying the same about you because they're surely saying the same about me at times as well.

There's just things getting in the way sometimes. And when you're saying like, all these people that might piss you off, but how do I get them to change their behavior? I hate to say it, but they may be saying the same about you because they're surely saying the same about me at times as well.

And so it's really about how do we come to some mutual understanding and how do we collaborate with one another? And what we found is we've sort of developed a bit of a formula for how to do that. And we'll see that not only does it sort of have proven results, but it maps on to how our brains work, how our brains process information.

And so it's really about how do we come to some mutual understanding and how do we collaborate with one another? And what we found is we've sort of developed a bit of a formula for how to do that. And we'll see that not only does it sort of have proven results, but it maps on to how our brains work, how our brains process information.

And so it's really about how do we come to some mutual understanding and how do we collaborate with one another? And what we found is we've sort of developed a bit of a formula for how to do that. And we'll see that not only does it sort of have proven results, but it maps on to how our brains work, how our brains process information.

And to boil it down a little bit, when somebody's pissing you off with their behavior, you want to sort of tell them what to do. And the reality is they're never going to listen to you unless you start by listening to them. And we'll talk about exactly what a formula of that looks like.

And to boil it down a little bit, when somebody's pissing you off with their behavior, you want to sort of tell them what to do. And the reality is they're never going to listen to you unless you start by listening to them. And we'll talk about exactly what a formula of that looks like.

And to boil it down a little bit, when somebody's pissing you off with their behavior, you want to sort of tell them what to do. And the reality is they're never going to listen to you unless you start by listening to them. And we'll talk about exactly what a formula of that looks like.

You got it.

You got it.

You got it.

Yes. And here's why, though. Okay. Tell me why. Well, because if you believe kids do well if they can. Yes. Or people do well if they can. Yes. What you're doing is you're embracing a mindset shift because that's not the most common way of thinking about people and their behavior, especially when they're behaving in ways that piss you off. Right. Or are very concerning. Right.

Yes. And here's why, though. Okay. Tell me why. Well, because if you believe kids do well if they can. Yes. Or people do well if they can. Yes. What you're doing is you're embracing a mindset shift because that's not the most common way of thinking about people and their behavior, especially when they're behaving in ways that piss you off. Right. Or are very concerning. Right.

Yes. And here's why, though. Okay. Tell me why. Well, because if you believe kids do well if they can. Yes. Or people do well if they can. Yes. What you're doing is you're embracing a mindset shift because that's not the most common way of thinking about people and their behavior, especially when they're behaving in ways that piss you off. Right. Or are very concerning. Right.

The more common way of thinking about it is kids do well if they want to.

The more common way of thinking about it is kids do well if they want to.

The more common way of thinking about it is kids do well if they want to.

And if you believe kids do well if they want to, and a kid's not doing well, you're going to assume the reason they're not doing well is because they don't want to. Yes. So then what are you going to do about it? You're going to try to- Pressure them. Make them want to. Correct. And we start this very early on with kids, with rewards and consequences and things like that.

And if you believe kids do well if they want to, and a kid's not doing well, you're going to assume the reason they're not doing well is because they don't want to. Yes. So then what are you going to do about it? You're going to try to- Pressure them. Make them want to. Correct. And we start this very early on with kids, with rewards and consequences and things like that.

And if you believe kids do well if they want to, and a kid's not doing well, you're going to assume the reason they're not doing well is because they don't want to. Yes. So then what are you going to do about it? You're going to try to- Pressure them. Make them want to. Correct. And we start this very early on with kids, with rewards and consequences and things like that.