Jay Reeve

Reliability?

Somehow still better than most.

And crucially, Dino was Jason's only ally in this whole event.

So naturally, he was off limits, at least while he was in the room.

The second Dino disappeared, Jason would quietly start lining him up like everybody else.

Loyalty had a very flexible definition on this trip.

Meanwhile the equipment situation wasn't helping our credibility.

One bike looked like it had been modified by a lunatic, some kind of aerodynamic upgrade bolted on the front that made it resemble a deranged metallic unicorn with serious issues.

Watching it roll past was like witnessing engineering give up entirely.

The rider looked like a hairless goblin clinging on for dear life.

Thor spent the entire event running a completely separate mission, acquiring photos from his girlfriend.

Every notification was treated like a trophy catch.

Hey, I got another one, boys!

He'd proudly announce.

Like he was pulling a snapper out of the ocean.

Meanwhile, the rest of us were trying to process how this had become his main contribution to the event.

Then there was Clayton.

Clayton played the long game and lost.

Spent the entire weekend staring at his phone, putting out hopeful messages like bait into an empty ocean.

Nothing.