Jay Reeve

Not a fucking nibble.

And by the end, the man looked like he'd just learned patience has its limits and dignity is always optional.

Through it all, Jason maintained his role as a walking, talking, health and safety pamphlet, but only when it suited him.

Crossing the road without looking?

Oh, fucking hell, guys, that's a bit dangerous.

No helmets?

Absolutely not.

That's irresponsible.

Starting in rough weather?

Well, I strongly object to this, guys, but suggest getting absolutely sideways on the piss and making questionable life choices mid-event.

Jason's front of the queue.

Fucking let's go, lads.

The man could detect a missing seatbelt from 50 metres but had zero issues with chaos as long as it didn't involve cardio.

Thor, now sensing his weakness, leaned into it hard.

Every attempt by Jason to stretch the route purely to avoid arriving early again was met with just enough support to keep it going, followed immediately by relentless ridicule.

What was meant to be Jason's crowning achievement turned into a full-scale character assassination.

Even Clayton, mild emotional devastation, managed to contribute.

Fucking hell, honestly, Jase, great effort.

This is exactly the sort of place a plunket nurse would be proud of.

Oh, the sort of place a plunket nurse would be proud of.