Logan Urie
speaker
760 appearances
2 recordings
1 series
first heard Dec 2024
last heard 16 Feb
Logan Urie’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 1 in all, peaking in Feb 2026 with 1.
Appearances
And you're never going to get that with dating. And I actually think that's a really hard shift for people to understand that you'll never feel like, oh yeah, I'm 100% sure that this is the person. You sort of have to trust yourself and then take a leap. So do you not believe in a soulmate? Not at all. I actually don't either.
I think there's so many people that you can make it work with and you'll have different stories with different people. But I love my life with my husband, but I could have had a different life with someone else.
I completely agree.
Of course, you want to choose someone who you can have a great relationship with, but great relationships are built. They're not discovered.
And if you really understand that you can build the relationship of your dreams, it takes the pressure off of finding the perfect person. I am definitely a maximizer in my life and it is challenging for me, but there's, instead of the maximizer framework, there's something called a satisficer. So this is somebody who says, I have expectations and they can be really high.
But once I find something that satisfies those expectations, I'm going to go with it and not overthink it. So during the pandemic, I needed to buy my first car. And my husband and I said, okay, we want something used, something that's a hybrid. And we want to spend under this amount. We went to two places. There was one red used Toyota Camry hybrid and we bought it. And I love our car.
And it didn't spend months looking for the perfect car. I said, this meets our expectations. Let's do it. And so satisficing, we know from the research that they're happier because they don't spend their whole lives saying, what about this? What about that? They say, I wanted to find someone who I was attracted to, who was funny and who was smart. I found her. I'm going to invest in her.
That person's so much happier than the guy who spends another decade looking for this perfect person.
I love that. There's this quote that I love from Charles Darwin, which is, it's not the strongest species that survives nor the most intelligent. It's the one that's most responsive to change. And that's great advice for relationships because it's not the couple that was the most in love when they met or had the most in common.
It's the couple that acknowledges we're going to have a long relationship together and I'm going to change and you're going to change and we need to adapt to that. What about the hesitator? The hesitator who I do have a soft spot for, it's really about getting out there. And it reminds me of your quote, start before you're ready. Yeah. Because nobody's ever 100% ready.
And so I have clients who read tons of books about dating. They're excited to talk to me, but they're not going on any dates. And I'll say to them, we can't have another appointment until you have gone on at least three dates because they're not putting themselves out there. And then they say, but I'm so bad at it. I'm like, nobody...
wakes up one day and knows how to play the guitar, you practice and you get better at it. So the only way to get better at dating is by dating. And so start before you're ready, set a deadline for yourself, get some cute outfits, pick some fun first date ideas, have a friend hold you accountable and just start dating.
The number one thing is having a great profile. So I can tell you some good profile tips. Let's hear the profile tips. So in our research at Hinge, we found that your first photo should be a clear headshot. No filters, no sunglasses. Just what do you look like?
And then in your photos, you should- Professional headshot, a selfie with friends, with not like- I'm using the term headshot a little loosely, but just a photo of your face where it's clear to see what you look like. Alone? Nobody else in it, definitely. Do you see that in the data that you don't want somebody else in it? Oh yeah, it's so confusing. People are just like, which one are you?
And then they don't investigate. They just say, that's annoying. And they say, no. Okay, did you hear that everybody? Just you. It literally is answering the question, what do you look like? So just show us your face. In your photos, you should have a photo of you doing something that you love. So if you like hiking, if you love playing Scrabble, just paint a picture for us of your life.
Then you should have a full body shot. That's something that came up in the research. People want to see what you look like.
Not necessarily. It's just something where we looked at the research of the profiles of people who were really successful. What did they include? And what does successful mean? Meaning that they're finding matches and deleting the app because they're in a relationship.
You know, it's interesting because that really is what success looks like for people. So these are just tools to get to the point where you can go on your last first date.
So I'm laughing at this because pet peeves have become a pet peeve for me, where I get so frustrated with people, where I met this woman a while ago and she was like, Logan, I'm single. Do you know anyone? I'm open to anyone you want to set me up with unless he's a mouth breather. And I was like, what? And she's like, oh, you know, people who breathe out of their mouths. It's so annoying.
And so people have this list of pet peeves that are small things that annoy them more than maybe they annoy someone else, but they confuse them for deal breakers, real fundamental incompatibilities that mean that you shouldn't be in a relationship with someone.
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