Master The Skill of Self Validation
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
Hello, beautiful beans, and welcome to the podcast episode of today. My name is Alexis Fernandez. This is Do You Fucking Mind, and today we are going to be talking about how to master the art of self-validation. I'm going to be breaking down Exactly what is validation and why is it that you know we seek it so often from outside of ourselves? What is the difference between self-validation and external validation? I'm also going to be talking about where there is healthy external validation and why that actually is necessary and it's not just some weird compulsion that we have as humans, but there's a reason for it. And then what's the more unhealthy way and how to kind of get rid of the unhealthy? Healthy, keep the healthy, and how we can provide a lot of that validation for ourselves.
So we're gonna be talking about all of that. I think I've got eight points. I normally go over the points, I miscalculate, but I think it's eight that I have written down. So by the end of this episode, you will feel that you have already quite a few tools already at your disposal that you can start putting into practice to really change how you feel about feeling. something worthy and validated and good enough in all areas of your life, okay? So if that's not tempting enough, then fucking turn this thing off and goodbye. Otherwise, stay listening. Now, quick little life update before we get into it is that tonight I am going to see Practical Magic 2. I literally have only watched Practical Magic once back back in the day.
So I kind of regret that I didn't re-watch it in the lead up, but I mean, I'm very excited. So stay t stay tuned for my review on Practical Magic. And then apart from that, my house is upside down. My quest to become the most I feel like I need to do a series on Instagram, but my quest to become the most organized version. Version of myself has caused my house to be in complete disarray because I am doing a full restructure of where things are. I'm moving the kids' room from one room to another room. I've gotten my office, I've moved a whole bunch of my office shit to an external office. And now there is shit everywhere. And when that happens, it inspires me to want to get rid of 90% of my possessions, which I then
Regret because most of my possessions I would actually need, and I'm not really that much of a hoarder at heart. But I just hate having too much stuff. I really don't like it. And you just accumulate and accumulate and accumulate. Like not that long ago, I want to say like maybe even just six years ago, I used to be able to put all my possessions into suitcases. And now it's a shit show. So I feel like you know how they say, you know, you take two steps forward, you go one step back. I've taken two steps forward as far as getting organized, and now I've taken five steps back. If you were to see the state of my home at the moment, I mean, I RIP to Tyrone when he gets home because I started this whole project and then I'm like, fuck it, I'm gonna go to the office and record an episode.
So he's going to arrive to a surprise, a lovely surprise of shit everywhere. I've created a pile. for him to take, you know, to charity and then to storage and this. He's gonna love it. He's gonna absolutely fucking be thrilled. Anyway, recommendation for you guys. I would say the do you fucking mind card game is the fucking recommendation for you. So if you haven't yet played it, buy it and play it all. Find a friend who already owns it and play it. I've had actually a few people order the card game as of late. So I'm gonna yeah, remind you guys of it relatively often so you keep buying it because it's a great way to get to know. It's not even just a romantic partner, it's to get to know your friends. You can play this with your siblings and be like, wow, I actually didn't know that about you, or I didn't know that you went through that, or I didn't know that you were feeling that.
It's just a really, really good way to get to know someone on a deeper level and you can play. Play it. More than just once, which is cool.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
0:12–4:35
2
Why do we seek validation, and when is external validation healthy?
4:35–10:11
3
How can tying your identity to one role affect your self-worth?
10:11–13:15
4
How can self-consistency help you build confidence and validate yourself?
13:15–18:28
5
How can you avoid unhealthy validation cycles in dating and social media?
18:28–21:30
6
How can you talk through difficult emotions without attacking yourself?
21:30–24:46
7
How does honoring your personal values help you feel more self-assured?
24:46–28:02
8
How can reading the room help you balance self-expression with feedback?
28:02–36:49
Speakers
1 identifiedMore from Do You F*cking Mind?
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