Your Body Is Already Talking. Here's What It's Saying | Linda Clemons

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Good Life Project 52 min 3 speakers 8 chapters transcribed 4 months ago
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What does nonverbal communication reveal about us?

Jonathan Fields 0:00
So here's something that might change the way you think about nearly every conversation you have today. According to my guests, research says 93% of what you communicate to another person has nothing to do with the words coming out of your mouth. It's about posture. It's about your eye contact, the way your arms are positioned, whether your body is open or closed, the direction your feet are pointed, even the micro expressions flickering across your face in fractions of a second. All of it is telling a story. And most of us never once stop to ask what story our body is telling. My guest today, Linda Clemens, has spent more than 30 years as one of the world's leading experts in body language and nonverbal communication.
Jonathan Fields 0:42
She's trained Fortune 500 CEOs, elite sales teams, celebrities, leaders across industries to master the silent signals that build trust, create connection, and command a room without ever saying a word. Her best-selling book is called Hush. And in this conversation, we go deep into what she calls the four power zones of the body and why keeping them open or closed changes everything.

How can body language impact job interviews?

Jonathan Fields 1:06
From a high stakes interview to a conversation with your kid. We talk about how our biases show up in our bodies before they ever reach our mouths. And she tells a story about a manager who unknowingly convicted the wrong person using nothing but his posture. We get into the three patterns that hijack us in pressure moments, frozen, flooding, and flat. And we explore the question that Linda says changes everything. Not what do I want to say, but how do I want this person to feel when they leave my presence? This one is really practical and warm and immediately useful. So excited to share this conversation with you. I'm Jonathan Fields, and this is Good Life Project. I'm deeply fascinated by how we show up, by how we communicate, by how we don't communicate.

What are the four power zones of the body?

Jonathan Fields 1:56
And even more so by how we transmit things to each other without ever actually thinking that we're doing that. You share that before we even open our mouths, our bodies are already telling a story about us when we walk into a room or into a conversation. Take me into this idea more.
Linda Clemons 2:18
Absolutely. So first of all, Jonathan, again, thank you for having me on your show. What's so important if we think about this, our nonverbal communication is primitive. It existed before we were able to speak a word. And so just imagine, it's the thing that protects you that's a part of your limbic system. When from 2000 or more years, when you would meet someone, the first thing you would do, you would scan their body. You would scan the body to...

How do biases manifest in our nonverbal cues?

Linda Clemons 2:48
to determine if they are a friend, a foe, or perhaps a feast. You know what I'm saying? And that's what we do. But the body is speaking before you even say a word. So, for example, you and I could communicate if someone walks in the room, and perhaps someone that looks a little odd or strange or someone we least expect, and we may look at each other and do an eyebrow flash like, hmm. Wonder who that is without saying a word. So again, even when you were a little baby, you couldn't form words. You made sounds and gestures. So that's how important our nonverbal is. And I have one of my quotes that I love.

What are the three patterns that derail communication in high-stakes moments?

Linda Clemons 3:32
It's by Emerson. And it goes like this. I cannot hear what you're saying because who you are being is getting in the way. Wow. I cannot hear what you're saying because who you're being, your actions. And you've heard the phrase, action speaks louder than words. And if my late granny was alive, she'd say, baby, I hear you talking, but I don't see you walking. So it is so important there's a conversation that just standing there, just looking around, whether we say anything or not, that's speaking louder than your words.
Jonathan Fields 4:07
Yeah, I mean, that makes so much sense. And as you were describing that, I was also wondering, well, where does this come from?

How can we ensure our nonverbal communication aligns with our intentions?

Jonathan Fields 4:13
But you kind of spoke to that. I guess there's probably no real way for us to answer where does this come from, but it would make sense that there's a survival mechanism at play here.

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