Side Stories: Pizza Party

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Last Podcast On The Left 1h 17m 5 speakers 8 chapters transcribed
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What shocking revelations were uncovered in the latest Epstein files?

Marcus Parks 0:01
there's no place to escape to this is the last podcast on the left side stories that's when the cannibalism started side stories yes
Henry Zebrowski 0:20
Because I was trying to work on my Robin Leach before this. Yeah? Can you give me a, let me see what you got. It's like, lifestyles of the rich and famous. It's almost like you've got to be more of an asshole.
Marcus Parks 0:31
It's like, lifestyles of the rich and famous.
Henry Zebrowski 0:35
Famous. He was a big part of my childhood. Yeah, all of us. We love looking at big houses. Oh, my God. We were fascinated with it. And Robin Leach was the very first impersonation I ever did. Really? As a little boy. And we actually have a home video of me going around the house, going like, opulence! share opulence and then going like and then there's a photo of the honesty it is a funny bit it's wonderful what your house looks like oh of course yeah and then i on camera took a thing of my mom's favorite perfume or big fish a big fancy perfume and it's been like can you even imagine it's stinky bleach i get going it's stinky bleach and i dropped it right i dropped it and it Exploded all over, because Jackie was holding the camera the whole time.
Henry Zebrowski 1:25
It fucking went everywhere. And then, like, I was trying to all mix it up, you know, trying to clean it up. And then, obviously, my mom comes home, right? I forgot what it was. She was like, out.
Marcus Parks 1:34
It just reeks. Oh, yeah.
Henry Zebrowski 1:35
And she's like, what'd you do? And we're like, nothing. Nothing.
Marcus Parks 1:38
Nothing.

Who is the Piggyback Bandit and what are his recent exploits?

Marcus Parks 1:38
I didn't do nothing.
Henry Zebrowski 1:39
She's like, you were playing with the video camera. I was like... Maybe. Yeah, whatever. Yeah, you know. We make videos. We're fun. Puts the video in. It was a wonderful, like, it was this wonderful moment of them all watching me destroy the thing on camera and have all the evidence of it on camera. Were you just, like, waiting for a way to refute it, even though, like, you just knew it was about to happen?
Eddie Pepitone 2:02
Do we not understand, mother, how media can be manipulated?
Henry Zebrowski 2:05
Are you going to see you eating the VHS tape? Ha ha ha! And that's how Robin Leach first taught me to cover up crimes. Ah, yes. Welcome to Side Stories. My name is Henry Zebrowski. I'm sitting here with Ed Larson. How you doing? And honestly, and it's not code at all, kind of crazy, our cheese pizzas just got here. My question is, is that, did the grape get here yet? Is my grape soda here yet? Oh, it's the grape.
Unknown 2:32
You think it's the grape?
Henry Zebrowski 2:32
I have the pizza glove, though. Oh, my pizza glove. Thank you so much. Great, great, great. No fingerprints on the pizza. No, no, no. Actually, Eddie. Oh, it's a dildo hand. Can you please give me a big, look at this big, fun pizza glove.

What details emerged about Jill Biden's ex-husband's murder charge?

Henry Zebrowski 2:46
What is this? Oh, God. What a great pizza glove. Is this really what we're spending the new budget on? Can you please bring me a big, nice slice of pizza? Here we go. Uh-oh, Champ wants some pizza. Uh-oh. Oh, he's very young. He's very young. But that's never stopped anybody from having pizza before.
Unknown 3:01
Yum, yum.
Henry Zebrowski 3:02
That's for fucking certain. Oh, nothing I like better than a thin, wasted, prepubescent slice of pizza. Still hot like it's from the fires of hell. I'm eating mine without protection.

How did a Canadian snowboarder become a drug kingpin?

Henry Zebrowski 3:17
I'm going rum, raw dog in mine. I don't care what I get from this. No condoms. Must be Bill Gates. You dirty fucking nerd.
Unknown 3:32
I heard they're going to change his name to Bill Gapes. Hey, come on. All right.
Henry Zebrowski 3:35
What are we doing here? How many spots is he? Do you remember when Bill Gates was really concerned about drinking poo-poo water? Now I know why. He loves it. Now I know why. That fucking pervert was so excited to drink piss legally in front of everybody, he created a whole fucking charity around it. Honestly, they made the doc, it's on HBO, and they put a bunch of shit into a machine, and then he drank the water with a big smile on his face. I don't care. Sure. Can you actually bury it over in the back of the ranch? Yeah, yeah, if you don't mind, yeah.

What happened in the failed FBI impersonation attempt involving pizza?

Henry Zebrowski 4:09
If you don't mind, if you could dig a shallow grave and put some of those pizzas over behind where the ranch ends in New Mexico. Or if it's too much, St. Lucia Island will be fine. If you could, also St. Bart's is a way to get there as well.

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