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The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz

Local Hour: The Monster Miami Sports Night

15 Dec 2025

Transcription

Chapter 1: What happens when Dan refuses to celebrate the Jai Alai Battle Court title?

0.672 - 27.343 Chris Cody

Coming off a losing fantasy week, that means you're one week closer to losing your league. That's stressful, which can lead to nighttime teeth grinding. Dentek wants to prevent teeth grinding and has raised the fantasy stakes with a once-in-a-lifetime punishment. Keep an eye out for the ultimate fantasy football punishment reveal at the NFL Pro Bowl. or on Dentek.com slash ultimate punishment.

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27.624 - 36.67 Chris Cody

If you're still feeling fantasy stress, try a Dentek nighttime dental guard to protect your teeth. Available at all major retailers.

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38.472 - 56.237 Zach Zaslow

All right, kicking things off with Smirnoff, the official vodka sponsor of the NFL and the number one vodka in the world. Chris Cody, you're here. Smirnoff! Wow, you're on the money with Smirnoff. Smirnoff! Chris, you know what goes great with Smirnoff? Smirnoff! Yes, but I'm really talking about the game day fit. The style's got to match the vibe. Smirnoff! All right, here's the deal.

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56.697 - 72.296 Zach Zaslow

Game day is everything. And that's exactly why your fit has to match the occasion. Smirnoff! Starting this December, Smirnoff is giving fans 21 and over the chance to score limited edition Smirnoff commission merchandise from some of today's top creators, including Kayla Jones, Gavin Matthew, and Alaylee May.

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72.317 - 72.497

Smirnoff!

72.737 - 85.352 Zach Zaslow

Here's the kicker. One lucky fan will take home the grand prize, a trip to the biggest game of the offseason. Plus, one fan will win Alaylee May's one-of-one game day jacket. Wow. The merch will be dropped on select dates from December to January 21, and it's all courtesy of what brand?

85.512 - 85.692

Smirnoff!

86.228 - 104.313 Zach Zaslow

That's right, Chris. Fans 21 and over can head to Smirnoff Socials to learn how to sign up. And don't forget to grab a bottle of Smirnoff vodka, number 21, at your local retail. Smirnoff. Please drink responsibly. Smirnoff. Number 21 vodka distilled from grain, 40% alcohol by volume. The Smirnoff Company, New York, New York. Please do not share with anybody under legal drinking age.

104.333 - 114.868 Chris Cody

Smirnoff. No purchase necessary. Must be legal. U.S. resident, 21 or older. Sweepstake starts 12-15-2025 at 12 a.m. Eastern and ends 1-23-2026 at 11-59-59 p.m. Eastern. See official rules at program website.

Chapter 2: Why does Zaslow believe the Chiefs' dynasty is over?

429.363 - 434.71 Zach Zaslow

How confident leaving that draft room were you in this version of the team? The vibes were really strong leaving that draft.

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434.93 - 443.661 Chris Cody

I'm just so glad we stuck with Manu this whole time. The start, the end, I'm so happy. Manu's the man. This is the Manu's championship right here.

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443.641 - 461.62 Zach Zaslow

And Mike, we'll ask you too, how's it feel, second championship in Cyclones team history? Man, it felt like a really long time to be able to go full circle, close things out here in Magic City. It's a special feeling, special team. Like Chris said, to be able to stick with our captain, Manu is such a special player, best back quarter in the world.

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462.08 - 470.509 Zach Zaslow

Bueno coming back from injury, being super steady when the whole world doubted him. Jairo, I'm so happy for him. He's a veteran. He's never been to a final before.

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470.489 - 493.856 Zach Zaslow

for him to win it he was a crucial crucial draft pick are you looking at the gm of the year you might be looking at the gm of the year and the special weapon under the under take a let's go club all right we'll let them celebrate enjoy their moment folks what a season yeah I can't tell you how much I love that mascot for all the wrong reasons.

493.956 - 512.232 Zach Zaslow

Like, I wanted him to come in here this week and stained from a weekend of debauchery with smoking a cigarette. I saw that during that interview Mike said you might be looking at the GM of the year, whereupon Chris Cody pops up in your screen and then runs off of the screen as soon as Mike says we're looking at the GM of the year.

512.252 - 516.836 Zach Zaslow

And I don't know whether he was talking about is Mike the GM of the year or is Chris the GM of the year? Oh, just stop it.

Chapter 3: What are the implications of the Bills not winning the Super Bowl?

516.876 - 537.558 Zach Zaslow

Why are you trying to drive a wedge You can't do it. It's not possible. Is it in your DNA to just be happy for people? You open four seconds into the show. You can't spell Dan without the D, the N, and the A. Come on, dog. I mean, to Dan's point, who is the GM of the year? The Cyclones. We'll share it. You guys are getting bogged down on the wrong thing.

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537.578 - 548.269 Zach Zaslow

You said, looking at the DM of the year, who is it? We are season eight battle core champions. Period. That's a headline here. Where was the Greg Cody column?

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548.587 - 550.211 Unknown

Where was it?

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551.113 - 565.387 Zach Zaslow

Where was it? Next to the back of my day. Are you serious? Yeah. Yeah. You wrote an article about Chris becoming owner. You'd think that we'd get a full circle. There seems to be a conflict of interest on the reporting that Greg Cody does on this show versus real journalism.

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565.407 - 566.089 Greg Cote

What makes you say that?

566.069 - 573.799 Zach Zaslow

You wrote an article about your son being the owner of the Cyclones. Yeah, I barely remember that. How emotional was it? You were there.

573.859 - 574.58 Smokey Robinson

Yeah, I was there.

574.62 - 587.377 Zach Zaslow

When you say you barely remember, we remember. Before this moment, the most memorable moment at Highline, at that fronton, was you coughing so much during the pandemic that you fell down on the floor. You passed out and you fell down on the floor.

587.538 - 610.991 Mike Ryan

I fainted is what happened. I did not faint the other night because the adrenaline was coursing through my veins. It was an exciting night. Hundreds of fans were there. And the action was great. I mean, it was just—it's a really interesting sport. Highline has died all over the country, but we're keeping it alive in South Florida. I watched the whole thing, Dan.

Chapter 4: How does Greg Cote showcase his impressions during the episode?

763.953 - 768.1 Mike Ryan

It's long. You know, you've got to tighten it a little bit. Like, what is it, a best of five? I've never heard.

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768.08 - 790.27 Zach Zaslow

I have never heard, after winning a championship, someone who actually cares about their team complaining that it was a long game that they had to watch. It's because you two don't care. No, I care. No, you're noticing the length of the championship win because you're looking at your wristwatch wanting to get out of there. You don't actually care. Look at this. What a moment.

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790.29 - 794.716 Zach Zaslow

You can stop faking that you care by complaining about how long the match is.

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794.857 - 797.02 Greg Cote

Look at this. That's a man carrying right there.

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797.1 - 798.182 Zach Zaslow

Hoisting the trophy.

798.262 - 798.482 Greg Cote

Damn right.

798.502 - 823.575 Zach Zaslow

Earlier this year, he gave you crap for banging a drum at a Panthers game. We can see why there was no highlight article after this. Put it on the poll, please. I'm too close to the sport. At Levitard Show, did you foresee a circumstance where the Dolphins season would last longer than the Chiefs season? At Levitard Show. It's the holiday season and the 50th anniversary of Miller Lite.

823.595 - 840.662 Zach Zaslow

The holiday is all about spending time with friends and family. Why don't you sit back and toast a few Miller Lites? Make your holiday time tis Miller time. And with the 50th anniversary of Miller Lite, you get to remember and reflect on all the good times that you had with your trusty buddy by your side, Miller Lite.

840.642 - 861.784 Zach Zaslow

Brewed for flavor with simple ingredients like malted barley, rich, balanced toffee notes, and that iconic golden color. And at 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces, it lets you enjoy the season without weighing you down. The original light beer since 1975 and still hitting different 50 years later. The best holiday beers are the ones you don't expect. Miller Lite. Great taste. 96 calories.

Chapter 5: How does the conversation shift to the Miami sports scene?

1253.668 - 1271.447 Zach Zaslow

No, they did. Okay. They did. They've got a great quarterback. Look, what tilts the odds in your favor on one-score games is do you have a great quarterback? So yeah, if you've got a great quarterback, you're more likely to win one-score games. But this year, Mahomes is a great quarterback and wasn't able to win them because it's not an ability.

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1271.427 - 1284.729 Mike Ryan

Okay, I think winning teams often get denigrated for reasons like this. Okay, we're saying that New England's 10-game winning streak was because they had a soft schedule. We're saying Denver is winning a lot of close games.

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1284.789 - 1306.668 Zach Zaslow

Denver just beat Green Bay, which was a real... Denver's average margin of victory during this winning streak, during the 11 wins, is 7 points. It's the smallest one ever for this kind of winning. Okay. Ever. They're not dominating people. They're just beating them. And you tell me whether you'd be surprised if Bo Nix loses a playoff game to Herbert by one score.

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1307.009 - 1311.998 Mike Ryan

I wouldn't be surprised by much this season. This has been a crazy NFL season all the way around.

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1312.028 - 1326.964 Zach Zaslow

To that point, though, yeah, they've been beating teams just barely. But then you look at a team like Green Bay who you look and say, OK, they might be the best team in the league. And then they dominate that team. And you're like, OK, wait, like this team might be for real with the defense. And Bo Nix could just do enough. He has another four touchdown performance and they can go on a run.

1326.984 - 1349.015 Zach Zaslow

They can make it to the Super Bowl easily. A lot of teams in the AFC could make it to the Super Bowl easily because you've got all of the usual participants in the AFC out. Look at how many quarterbacks have appeared in the AFC championship game over the last 22 years. It's like five or six in terms of like, it's always the same guys in the game and now they're all eliminated.

1349.395 - 1368.425 Zach Zaslow

So of course you're looking at what Josh Allen, the story of the day yesterday, there was a ton of football news yesterday, right? A ton. The football story of the day yesterday was what Buffalo did to New England as New England's trying to wrestle the top of the division from them. And all I'm listening to during the game, Drake Mays blocking down the field.

1368.606 - 1387.821 Zach Zaslow

Everything's about, he's the MVP, he's the MVP, he's the MVP. No, he's not. No, he's not. The MVP played in the other huddle. The MVP is the guy who scores four touchdowns a game, 10 times more than anyone else since 2020. And it's the guy who came back from 21 down or what was it? Yeah, it was 21 down.

1388.161 - 1409.735 Zach Zaslow

The Patriots had the longest streak in league history of if they're up 17 at home, it was 120 games. They never lose the game and they lost it yesterday. As someone that just reps the shield, though, I came away bummed overall because of what happened to Mahomes. You rep the shield? I rep the shield, and I wanted to see Josh see if he could go through that quarterback.

Chapter 6: What are the highlights from the recent Miami sports events?

2127.587 - 2133.878 Mike Ryan

When Ed Oliver is healthy again, which should be soon, I think the Bills are appreciably better on defense.

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2133.858 - 2158.77 Zach Zaslow

I'm going to say it again off of that injury yesterday. This is from Bill Barnwell. Including sacks and quarterback knockdowns, Mahomes has been hit 153 times this season, a figure topped by only Justin Herber. It brings me to the way that Joe Burrow has been talking recently, that a lot of people have heard sort of the sadness in his voice because he's getting hit a lot.

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2158.99 - 2181.87 Zach Zaslow

It hurts to get up in the morning. It hurts to... rehab through injury. And I will tell you something else that hurts that I think is being undercovered when it comes to Joe Burrow speaking of sadness, because Joe Burrow may love football, but I think what he loves more is winning. It's winning football that he loves. Losing football is a different thing. And I will tell you that

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2181.85 - 2209.073 Zach Zaslow

The Cincinnati Bengals, before Joe Burrow got there, were a cheap, laughing stock organization for decades. A sad place to work. Cold, antiseptic. You don't like being at the facility, not just because you're losing, but because the program is cheap. Your owners don't actually care about winning. Joe Burrow going to the facility, losing or winning in a city that's different than that one?

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2209.492 - 2232.736 Zach Zaslow

Cold and your premises are cheap. Everything around you feels small. Joe Burrow lifts it, but the Bengals have been something you've laughed at for 40 years because they're cheap. And so Joe Burrow walks in and whatever, the stuff he's looking at everywhere is bleak, dark, and sad. Winning covers a lot, but losing doesn't help you getting up in the morning.

2232.776 - 2252.831 Zach Zaslow

If your body hurts and it's physically cold and you're walking to a program that you know is like, oh, This place is stinky. They're cheap people here. I've lifted them. And then you get yesterday. Do you have the sound of him in the postgame press conference yesterday where Joe Burrow the last couple of weeks sounds sad?

2252.852 - 2266.163 Zach Zaslow

And it makes me wonder whether he loves football or just winning at football. We haven't been a good football team. Bad football teams do losing things. Number one, your quarterback has to play better than I did today.

2266.624 - 2275.324 Dan Le Batard

Do you feel like there's too much weight on you where it feels like if you're not perfect, the team is good enough around you to pick you up?

2275.304 - 2290.09 Zach Zaslow

You know, I feel confident in all those guys in the locker room. There's not a team in the NFL that would have won the game today if I was a quarterback. Joe Flacco loves football. Phillip Rivers loves football. I don't know whether Joe Burrow loves football or just winning at football.

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