The Big Suey: Billy Apologizes to Australia

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The Dan Le Batard Show 43 min 10 speakers 8 chapters transcribed
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Why does Billy need to apologize to Australia?

Billy 1:33
Well, that was nice of someone to tell you because I had no idea that this was happening. I was told that he was leaving after Monday's show and then Monday comes and I woke up to an email at 10.30 saying, never mind, he's not going to be in today, so... I literally don't know where in the world he is at this moment. And we recorded Gallo's football last Thursday, and I thought I'd planned out this week's episode, and at no point was it mentioned that Australia was in play. So, down under.
Dan Le Batard 1:59
Good use of all you know about Australia. Excellent work.
Tony 2:03
Trip on the Bobby.

What happened with Stugotz in Australia?

Stugotz 2:04
I love Australia. Never been. I love a blooming onion as well.
Greg Cote 2:11
He's a thespian, Dan. Yeah.
Dan Le Batard 2:13
Was he there? That's how you'd star in a movie, right there. With that kind of alertness, you would be Daniel Day-Lewis. You would be. He's not actually there either.
Stugotz 2:23
Where is he?
Mike 2:24
No, you know how Stugatz is. Like, I think I'm going to Australia. Okay, cool. You want to tell us when? I don't know. Probably going to Syracuse first.
Billy 2:33
Wait, what?
Mike 2:34
Yeah, you know, your traditional Miami to Syracuse. You've got to go north to go south. Lax.
Billy 2:41
Wait. Lax. He's going up there for Lax. Oh, yeah. He has a daughter that goes to Syracuse.
Mike 2:46
Yes, but that daughter's in Australia.
Billy 2:48
I know that. That's why I was wondering why he's going there. He's going to Syracuse to watch his other daughter that doesn't go to Syracuse.
Dan Le Batard 2:52
For Lax. I love this as Operation Lax because I imagine he's just going to be doing lacrosse championships. And relaxing. Right. Operation Lax. So high. Putting the lax in not working very hard. But we don't know where he is. And Greg Cody sits in the seat, but he's afflicted with some of the same poisons on thinking he can do everything.
Billy 3:17
What if Stu Gatz like accidentally found himself in like a Brittany Greiner Russia situation in Australia? We're like, he didn't realize he couldn't just do whatever the hell he wanted in Australia, and then he gets arrested or detained.
Dan Le Batard 3:32
Didn't that happen to Stallone and Johnny Depp? But didn't it happen to Stallone, Johnny Depp for bringing an animal into the country, and Stallone for throwing steroids off of a balcony in Australia while the authorities closed in on it?
Mike 3:43
Yeah, but Stallone, his plan was effective in that they could not catch him with the performance-enhancing drugs.
Dan Le Batard 3:50
Because he was just throwing them off the balcony?
Billy 3:52
Yes.
Dan Le Batard 3:52
Allegedly.
Billy 3:53
Australia. Chill. Respectfully to the people of Australia and Morgan and all of those. It's a country of criminals. Whoa!
Dan Le Batard 4:01
That's factually true. Whoa! That's a fact. If every company, then every country is.
Billy 4:08
No. No. This colony was created... Didn't we just send a bunch of criminals to Australia? We don't know what to do with them. Over there. You just found this giant island over here and you guys figure it out. Is that not what happened?

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