What Are You Actually Afraid Of? | The Truth About Fear & Self-Doubt
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What are the fears that successful people still face?
Hi there, welcome along to another episode of High Performance with myself, Jake Humphrey.
And me, Damien Hughes.
With a very simple question today. What are you actually afraid of? How present is fear in your daily life, do you think, Damien?
it shows up as anxiety. I feel it in my stomach. I recognise when I feel nervous or when fear shows up, it's in my stomach is where it registers first.
What about you? I think fear for me... Shows up. I only have fear over two things, finances and health. Because I think I can pretty much cope with everything else. Right. I think I feel the pressure from building businesses. I think people often think, oh, if you've built a business that's, you know, like one of my businesses has 300 staff, oh, that must be lovely. No, it's not because one bad month or... or a few bad weeks, and you have got such huge outgoings that you feel the pressure every day. And I think health is like the thing that you can't control, especially when you've got children and you're married. You're not worried about yourself so much. It's everyone else's health all the time. And I also know that I'm a catastrophizer.
which I think is one of the reasons why I've had the career and the life that I've had, because I fear the worst all the time. Therefore, I run towards it and think, well, I better do something about it. So it's kind of an energy source for me in a strange way. And the reason why I wanted to talk to you about fear was because I was on stage doing a presentation a few days ago to a business. And I was talking about how life was pretty run-of-the-mill, if not even worse than that, a bit crap when I was a teenager.
Yeah.
By the way, sorry about my voice. My son had a cup final this weekend.
How does self-doubt manifest in high-performance athletes?
Oh, God. And I cheered and screamed so loudly. How did they get on? They did win with a last minute or a late penalty. And the video of me going, like that. I mean, why am I so excited about kids' football? How did that compare to... Actually, talking about fear... So how did that compare to Norwich getting a promotion? A million times. A million times more exciting than Norwich getting promoted. Or even hosting a Champions League final. Nothing comes close to watching your kids play sport. But actually it's relevant to fear because also when it starts to go wrong, nothing feels worse. And they were 3-1 up and 4-3 down. after a tricky few minutes and then eventually they won. So I was kind of pleased in the end.
Well, let me ask you then. So we're going to talk about Ferry in more detail. So when you speak to Seb and maybe he's feeling nervous before a cup final or like the anxiety is spiking, what do you say to him?
It's so interesting because this was the first time we'd ever had a conversation where I explained to him on the way to the final that, Bearing in mind he's only 10. So it's always all been about enjoy it, have fun, relax. But I knew that he was nervous ahead of this one. Because when you're in a final, you want to win it, right? You feel so close to winning it. And what I actually explained to him on the way there, I said, you do know that you're going to have to suffer today. He said, how do you mean? I said, there will, I promise you, Seb, there will be a moment in this game where you feel like you're not going to win. And all of those thoughts about your mum and dad and your sister and your coach and your teammates and what people at school are going to say, all of those things will start coming in your head.
And actually, that's a really interesting moment for you to remember that it's just fun.
What lessons can we learn from Jameela Jamil about saying yes and self-care?
It's just a game of football. But I promise you, and we'll talk about it afterwards, you will suffer. There will be a hard moment in this game. And actually to be 3-1 up and 4-3 down, having conceded three goals without reply, he did suffer. And I could see actually the way that he and all of his teammates were playing at that moment, they were suffering. Luckily, Seb actually scored to make it 4-1. And at that moment, obviously the psychology means that they are there than the ones with the freedom.
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Chapters
8 chapters
1
What are the fears that successful people still face?
0:02–1:44
2
How does self-doubt manifest in high-performance athletes?
1:44–3:25
3
What lessons can we learn from Jameela Jamil about saying yes and self-care?
3:25–6:23
4
How can we redefine our relationship with fear?
6:23–9:15
5
What insights does Scott McTominay share about self-doubt?
9:15–11:20
6
How does Phil Heath navigate his fears as a champion?
11:20–13:41
7
What does Robin Van Persie reveal about making fear manageable?
13:41–15:34
8
How can naming our emotions help us deal with fear?
15:34–35:32
Speakers
8 identifiedMore from The High Performance Podcast
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