Am I good in bed?

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The Hook Up 23 min 3 speakers 8 chapters transcribed 19 hours ago

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Am I actually good at sex or just over‑estimating my performance?

Cam Fraser 0:02

This is an ABC podcast.

Unknown 0:06

That was so great. It was okay. I didn't cum though. But you do usually cum though, right? Yeah, I mean

Nat Tanchich 0:18

with other guys. Am I bad at sex? How do you rate yourself in bed? Do you reckon you're good at sex? Bad? Great? Just average? Good sex is one of those things where you kind of just know it when you have it. But knowing what actually makes the sex good for you and your partner can boost your skill and your pleasure. I'm Nat Tanchich, and you deserve to have the best sex ever. So on this episode, I'll explore what makes someone great in bed, what it means to be sexually compatible with someone else, how we know when we're having great sex, and how anyone can get better with the right mindset. So how did you answer my first question? How do you rate yourself in the sack? If you reckon you're good, you're in the minority.

Nat Tanchich 1:10

According to a survey by Netflix, Aussies are surprisingly underconfident, with only 1 in 10 rating themselves as great lovers, and only about a third rating themselves as good. For the record, I wanted to check that with the Hookup Insta and got to say, people who listen to this pod like you are much more confident. About 60% reckon they're good at sex. And, yeah, it's probably because you're taking lessons from this pod. So what actually makes you good in bed? Is it getting everyone off or is there more to it? Hookup listeners had some thoughts about it. Do you think you're good at sex?

Unknown 1:47

I don't want to toot my own horn, but, yeah, I think I am.

Nat Tanchich 1:51

What do you think makes you good at sex?

Unknown 1:55

I guess the want to satisfy her.

What do the latest Netflix and Hookup surveys reveal about confidence in the bedroom?

Unknown 1:58

I guess that's a big one. And based on experience and stuff as well, it's like I sort of know what works and yeah, what doesn't and things like that. I guess how long as well, like just being able to go for like more than just the average time and it satisfies me satisfying them. I guess the phrase is true, you know, nice guys do finish last. I don't receive bad reviews, I'll put it that way.

Nat Tanchich 2:25

Okay, he's like modest, like really toned it down. Well, 100%.

Unknown 2:29

It's kind of hard to separate how good I am versus other things. The bar for men is so low that just talking to someone and listening to their needs is already beating a decent chunk, so I can't really separate how good versus just being a half-decent human being.

Nat Tanchich 2:48

How do you think you get the best sex out of an encounter? What's your strat? The

Unknown 2:52

most important thing is communication. Communication, patience and understanding is a great big one. If you're having sex with more than one person in your entire lifetime, you can't just approach every sexual encounter with the same mindset. You've got to go into it, you know, willing to learn, cooperate and understand. I think that with the people I am in bed with, I think it's good, but that's because I really like to make sure that My confidence is up to be able to have the conversations that are needed. I think it's been a lot of self-discovery and growth and I can't actually have penetrative sex anymore at the moment. I have to be really honest and really good at communicating that with others.

Unknown 3:31

Some of the things that I tick off with other partners is that they are passionate, they are playful, they are a bit of a tease. They have that sexual intellect to know when they need to back off or when they should actually take things further. They can read my cues and I can do the same for them. I would definitely say I like to toot my own horn, unlike some other people. I think, for me, my experience also comes from being a sex worker and understanding people's cues, actually listening to... what people really like what they don't like giving consent receiving consent and just in general like trying new things and then also like adding toys and things into the bedroom as well that's something that helps you and like communicating everything that is really important to you in bed

Nat Tanchich 4:23

Love hookup listeners. I swear this community is so switched on. But let's roll it back a bit because we can't really say what makes someone good at sex until we work out what good sex actually is.