Oprah and Esther Perel on the 3 Things Every Human Needs to Find Love
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Who is Esther Perel and what insights does she offer on relationships?
This episode of The Oprah Podcast is presented by Ulta Beauty. The possibilities are beautiful. It is a joy to be with you here on The Oprah Podcast, and I know your time means a lot to you, so I think it's just so special for me that you all are listening or watching on YouTube. Lots of people... Have Valentine's Day on their minds this week. And I know that for some people that brings up thoughts of romance and lack of romance. But my guest is renowned, renowned as a relationship therapist, an expert. She studies it. She knows it in her spirit, in her heart, in her brain. Esther Perel says all of our relationships with our family, with our friends, even our neighbors have a real impact on our most intimate relationships.
So welcome to the Tea House.
Thank you. Relationships are changing rapidly. Modern romance is undergoing an extreme makeover.
Esther Perel is a psychotherapist and bestselling author who's been counseling couples for over three decades.
You know, it's a little bit like sex. It used to be that you had to be ashamed if you had sex. Now you are ashamed if you don't.
I think her greatest gift is her intuitive insight into the human heart and mind. She really blows me away. Wow, I could cry over that. That resonates really powerfully with me. I heard that. Did you hear it, Jen? Absolutely. Her hit podcast, Where Should We Begin, is a must-listen for anybody looking to better understand the complexities of relationships.
One of the most challenging things about relationships and marriage in general has been communication.
I mean, sexual candor is really difficult.
Esther sees beyond the stories we tell ourselves. How did you know that? You don't even know her. And she's here to offer her unflinching truths. Say that again. Foreplay starts. At the end of the previous orgasm. So everybody, thanks for joining us on this podcast. I'm so happy. You're one of the people who is speaking the truth to families and people in relationships in a way, I think, that resonates profoundly and is actually changing the way people see themselves in their lives and relationships. So power to you for doing that in the world. Thank you. I try. And may I tell you, I don't know how I discovered these cards. I actually don't even remember how, but I actually ordered these on Amazon for myself. I got them for myself and then I love them so much. I send them out to friends because this is what happens when people come for dinner and Or come over for an evening and not everybody knows everybody.
What I found is that if you go through the cards and you pull out the cards and you make sure that the sexy cards are not there, children are there. And then I have a thing where everybody pulls a card and then I have them do another card and then another card. We do rounds of people pulling cards. So you have a whole stack of cards. So you don't just get one card. You get to choose from that card.
Right.
The question that you want to answer. And we go around and around. And it is so... Storytelling night. It's storytelling. It becomes storytelling. And it becomes an opportunity for people to express things and say things. I mean, I've learned things about my godchildren that I did not know. And so where should we begin? Which is, I know, based on your podcast, you've been doing that popular podcast for a few years now. It. Yes. Yes. Yes. So, which is just a perfect title. I love it. And so where... It's how I start many sessions, you know.
It's like you sit with new people you've never met and you just say, okay, where should we begin?
Yes. And I love this question. I just pulled these for us today. Something I wish I had been told as a child. What would that be for you? Something I wish I'd been told as a child.
The first thing that just jumped into my head is this. My mother told me that I came from the stork. And what I wish I had been told as a child was that there was no such a thing. As a stork. As a stork. I was nine years old when I understood that this is... Not true. No. And that it says more about her discomfort with the subject.
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