Luis J Gomez, LeMaire Lee, Kam Patterson, William Montgomery, Ari Matti, Hans Kim, D Madness, Michael A. Gonzales, Jon Deas, Matthew Muehling, Joe White, Kristie Nova, Yoni, Troy Conrad, Tony Hinchcliffe, Brian Redban - RECORDED– 03/24/2025 TONY HINCHCLIFFE @TONYHINCHCLIFE TONYHINCHCLIFFE.COM BRIAN REDBAN @REDBAN DEATHSQUAD.TV SUNSETSTRIPATX.COM Treat Mom right this Mother’s Day. Enjoy the ease and convenience of shopping Blue Nile, the original online jeweler. Go to https://bluenile.com today. Find Voodoo Ranger Mini Rippers nearby at https://voodooranger.com Go to https://ziprecruiter.com/killtony right now to try ZipIntro FOR FREE. Start paying rent through Bilt and take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to https://joinbilt.com/tony OpenPhone: Streamline and scale your customer communications with OpenPhone. Get 20% off your first 6 months at www.openphone.com/ Get $80 off your first month with promo code SPACE80 at https://talkspace.com/tony Go to https://shopify.com/killtony to upgrade your selling today. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Chapter 1: Who are the hosts and special guests on this Kill Tony episode?
Hey, this is Red Band, and you're listening to the Death Squad Podcast Network. This episode of Kill Tony and every episode of Kill Tony can be found at DeathSquad.tv, Apple, Spotify, and anywhere you get podcasts. Check out TonyHinchcliffe.com for everything The Golden Pony, Tony Hinchcliffe. You can also check out ShopSquad.tv for Death Squad merch, hats, mugs, whatever. ShopSquad.tv.
And now here's a brand new episode of Kill Tony.
Hey, this is Ryan Beck, coming to you live from the Comedy Mothership here in Austin, Texas, for a brand new episode of Kill Tony. Get up for Tony! Let's go!
Who's ready for the best fucking night of their lives, huh? Make some noise for the best damn band in the fucking land right there. Carlos Sosa, Raul Vallejo, Fernando Castillo on the horns. We have a leprechaun that we found on St. Patrick's Day. We kept him. He's on violin. Jay Kinney. Jake Kennedy, everybody, is his name. Wow. One of the Kennedys.
Hopefully he gets shot in the head by the end of the episode. How about a hand for Big Mike Michael Gonzalez on the drums, Matt Muehling on the electric guitar, John Dees on the keys, and this is indeed the one and only live in the flesh, the great and powerful Dee Madness on the bass guitar. This is the number one live podcast in the world, soon to be an Emmy-nominated television show.
Brought to you by Blue Nile Talkspace, Voodoo Ranger, and ZipRecruiter. How exciting is this? And before we get started, here's a little bit more from all the other amazing sponsors that made tonight's episode available for you here, right now. You guys ready to start tonight's fucking episode or what? All right. Every single week, I book two of the funniest guests in the world.
This week, no different. Ladies and gentlemen, two returning guests, two of my favorites. This is a mixture of chemistry of two guests. hilarious comedians that are willing to truly be themselves on this show. They're not nervous, they're fun. We're gonna have a blast.
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Chapter 2: What is the significance of Luis J. Gomez and LaMaire Lee's return to the show?
I present to you one of the record holders for all time appearances as a guest on this show and one of my favorite guests who debuted this year in 2025. Make some noise for Luis J. Gomez and LaMare Lee. Oh, yeah, baby. Luis J. Gomez, the creator of Skank Fest, the Legion of Skanks, and Story Wars. Skank hands are in the air. The great and powerful LaMare Lee, ladies and gentlemen.
Huge pro wrestling fan. Not getting the size of pop that he was expecting here. Powerful LaMare, one of my favorite goofy debut guests of 2025. Makes himself right at home. Very silly. I'm hanging out. One of the most likable characters humanly imaginable brought us to the... What?
These guys look mad.
No, they're happy. They're happy, LaMare.
All right. Don't make me give you the fist. Whoa. Yeah, they're actually racist. They're like a Puerto Rican and a black guy. We didn't pay for this shit. Yeah, exactly. This is Texas. Where's the white people?
That's right. In the audience. Luis J. Gomez is here. Truly, I do believe he may have the record now, for sure, I think.
I think so. It's 20-some-odd appearances. This is where brothers from back in the day was doing this show when it was in the Comedy Store belly room. 20, 30 people in the crowd. Look at this shit. You guys are going to Netflix.
Holy shit. Not only does he have the record for all-time appearances on the show, he also has the record for the least watched episodes ever. I actually glanced through for the first time in forever. I glanced through our video library today, and it's amazing how few some of these episodes were watched.
And I noticed a direct correlation between you and us only getting like a couple hundred thousand views. I'm like, wait, how's a 4,200,000?
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Chapter 3: What comedic perspectives does David Jolly share about politics and personal life?
Yeah. It's a one bedroom? It's a two bedroom. Two bedroom? Who lives in the other bedroom? Nobody, just me. You got the whole place?
Hell yeah, I walk around that bitch butt-ass naked. You run around naked? Let them nuts hang out, you hear me? And you have a couch and a TV and a... Yeah, I live pretty good right now, you know? I'm making a little couple dollars, you know what I mean? Yeah? My life is actually pretty fucking amazing, you know what I'm saying? You have a sound system? Um... Oh, you my... Hey, hey, hey.
I swear that bitch immune to black people. I ain't hear that bitch ever. You didn't hear it at all. I still don't hear it. I go home and be like, what the fuck is Red Bear talking about? I don't hear shit in here. Some goddamn bird loose in here. Yeah, you know what I mean?
Oh, man, that's funny. What do you think, if you had to speak on behalf of all African Americans, on why exactly... I'm noticing John... You know what I'm talking about. John, this was hitting close to home with John Dees. I've never really seen him laugh this hard at something.
If you had to speak on behalf of all African Americans on why it is that the smoke detector beep goes unnoticed with you people and you people only. And when I say you people, I fucking mean you people. I get it, I get it. Let there be no confusion here. Yeah, yeah. Why do you think it is that black people don't notice that they need to change the batteries in the smoke detector alarm?
This is a... You know that dog whistle that we can't hear but dogs can hear?
Uh-huh. It's like that with smoke alarms. Okay. Black people don't hear. I never heard it. I still don't hear it. It's the pitch.
Are you talking about when Trump gives a speech? Is that a dog whistle?
Hey, man, stop talking about Trump, man. You know what I'm saying? We live in Texas, buddy. Relax. You know what I mean? I like Trump. Oddly political. I didn't say anything bad. That bitch like that dog whistle, you know what I'm saying? Black people can't hear it. I ain't hear it at first until I listen hard enough, and I was like, oh, shit, that's a smoke. Smoke is happening.
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Chapter 4: How does Trish Smart describe her experience with dating and recent life events?
This guy was actually funnier than you.
Yeah. That's awesome.
Yeah. I'd love to hear his version of this story where he's like, hey, this homeless chick let me stay in her hotel room.
I'm afraid to say it, but your mustache kind of looks like my panty liner.
Okay, Trish. My mustache is covered in shit right now, just so you know.
I'll paint it later and then sell it.
Okay, this is getting weird.
Trish, please stop trying to... thaw the panel tonight it's not your roasting skills are are very very very very they're like complimentary would you like me to compliment you okay yes i'm gay good one trish let's just move forward i was gonna say trish how does it feel to be the reference photo for john waters plastic surgeon oh god jesus fucking christ trish
Nobody? All right.
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Chapter 5: What personal stories and stand-up experiences does Marvin Izzy share?
Well, I'm going to get into that now, because I'm under the weight that I wanted to be. Like, I wanted to stay at 165, and I'm 156, completely, you know, dyslexic. So, typical.
So Puerto Rican to try to get in the welterweight division. Hey, I have to make weight before I can start lifting, dude, so that I can fucking rape some dudes, dude. LaMare. I bet he has abs. Let's see. I bet you have abs. Compared to you, he has abs, LaMare. All right, here we go. Oh, fucking disgusting, ladies and gentlemen, absolutely. His stomach looks like your face. Oh, my God.
So, Marvin, how long you been doing stand-up?
14 years, man. 14 fucking years? Yeah, that's why I felt bad. I was real mad at myself last time I dropped the ball. I'm like, I ain't doing it tonight, no, hell no. I mean, you barely held onto the ball tonight. Yeah. You drop it, but, you know. I meant during the interview, because last time I was weird as shit. So I want to be at least, you know, positive weird today. Okay.
All right. Well, you're still in it right now, so be careful, because there's nothing weirder you can do than talk about how weird it could be right now in the interview. Whoa! There it is. Fucking dirt crasher. All right, Marvin. Tell me something crazy about your life that I didn't find out last time we were on. You've had some time to think about it?
Uh, yeah, man. It's funny you keep saying I'm out of shape. I used to actually wrestle. Uh-huh. Like, backyard wrestle and shit, so... Okay. What was your... Were you, like, a luchador or something? Did you wear a mask? No, I was a hardy, you know what I mean? I tried to be like a hardy boy and shit, but I was doing... I was doing... La Mer, what do you think about this? Did you jump off a roof?
Yeah, if there was one. It was like, since I was in the Bronx doing this shit, so we was doing it in, like, playgrounds, so I kind of jumped off that little hothouse shit that got, like, the slides and stuff. So I would do Swanton bombs off of that shit, you know what I mean? Onto the concrete? Rubber mats, you know, the ones that be burning in 90 degrees.
You got to throw water on that bitch before you lose hairs on your arm and shit, like... Okay, all right.
The people are relating down there. Yeah, they call it... You were more of a hearty essay. All right. All right. La Mer will now swallow the Incredible Hulk glove in one swallow like it's a pill. There you go. Shove it in that La Mer. All right. Marvin, you got little joke books, right? Last time, yeah. That's right. And there you go. It remains the same. Yeah. It was good. It was good.
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Chapter 6: How does RJ McKeegan use humor to discuss his dating life and identity?
I would have already drowned myself in Lady Bird Lake if it weren't for the fact that anybody that finds my dead body is just gonna assume that it's a gay one. Hey, it looks like it's one of them floating queers. He's floating face down, look at him. Oh, thank God. This is going better than I thought it would. Hell yeah. This place is fucking bright. Jesus. So many ugly people.
This is a very Austin crowd. You know what I mean? It's a very diverse crowd. Never seen so many different kinds of white people in my life. All right. Well, I guess that's all my time. My name is Matt Sargent.
All right. Matt Sargent. You have some extra stuff that doesn't even make sense. You have good jokes. I don't know why you're acknowledging how white the room. You're literally, this is a black, a Puerto Rican, black, Mexican, three Mexicans, black, super white. Why do you keep saying that? There's a gray guy. There's a fucking illegal immigrant right in front of you.
But he's with his dad, so it's okay. He's Mexican, Mexican. Is his dad legal? Don't make jokes. There's Mexicans everywhere. There's women everywhere. There's so many women in the crowd. You said there's 14 women here. They're the hottest ladies in Austin. In between your jokes, you make stuff up and then talk about the lighting. I'm nervous, I don't know, yeah. Yeah, you don't have to be.
Look at your hair. God, I wish you told me that 15 minutes ago. How could you be nervous with fucking hair like that? That's absolutely incredible.
Good hair on top of my head, and then I got a lot on my ass, so I think that's a personal issue. Okay, prove it. Absolutely not.
Uh-oh.
This is a nice belt buckle. I'm not unbuttoning this for nobody except Mr. Tony Hinchcliffe here, all right? Matt, what are you into exactly?
I got real incel vibes when you came out and called it a sausage fest with an average amount of women in the audience.
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Chapter 7: What are Matt Sargent's comedic views on Austin and his job selling boots?
Yeah, that's a great, great, great point, Lemaire. All right. I like boots. Sell me some boots. Here I come. I'm riding up. Oh, howdy. Whoa. Settle down, boy. Settle down. Get down. I'm going to slap that ass. Get over here, you fucking crazy horse. Howdy, buddy. Hey, you happen to know where I can find some boots around here?
Well, you rode this horse into this boot store. I figured you knew when you came in.
14.
There's no goddamn way you're a size 14, Tony. My friend. There's no way. I've seen people the size of Shaquille O'Neal with size 12 double E. There's no way you're a 14.
Well, well, well, let's just say me and my horse have something in common. Relax, Buster. Anyway, since you want to argue about the size, can you sell me something? What are you, are they more expensive the bigger they are?
No, it's all availability of like rare leathers, you know?
You're actually worse at selling boots than you are at comedy. That's crazy.
So, do you have any boots available? Of course I do, and Luis J. Gomez is a hater, and that's why he smokes... What cigar is that?
Oh, my God. What are you doing, bro? Focus. Sell me fucking boots, you fucking idiot.
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Chapter 8: What story does Cam Patterson share about attending a family wedding and confrontations there?
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