Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want
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What is the focus of Dr. Thema Bryant's new book?
Hello, and thank you for listening to the Oprah podcast. Hello to you watching on YouTube. We are diving into today, healing relationships with our loved ones and the one that matters the most, our relationship with ourselves. It's the ultimate. I want you to welcome with me Dr. Tama Bryant. Can we just speak a minute about what betrayal does to the spirit?
It's depleting. I'll tell you that much. You are not actually grieving the relationship. You're grieving your idea of what you thought the relationship would be. That is so powerful. For too long, we are made to believe that we must say yes to everything. And I want to tell you the holiness of no. No is a sacred word.
The holiness of no. I like that. I heard that.
Let the church say amen. A graduate of Duke University, Dr. Tama Bryant, who goes by Dr. Tama, is a clinical psychologist, a professor of psychology at Pepperdine University, and an ordained minister. Dr. Tama is the author of three books and is the host of the popular The Homecoming podcast, which raises awareness about mental health. Your latest book is called Matters of the Heart, which I was even so touched by the title. Matters of the Heart, Healing Your Relationship with Yourself and Those You Love. And let me say to all of you who are watching or listening, this book is a treasure. It's a treasure trove of wisdom for any phase of your life. And we have you covered on this episode. Whatever you're going through, Dr. Tama talks about how to set better boundaries, forgiving without receiving an apology. Yes. I'm going to say that again. Forgiving without receiving an apology. Don't we all want to know how to do that? Investing deeper in your current relationships and releasing those in your life who just are not healthy for you to let them, as Mel Robba
said on a previous podcast to let them go. And you start the book with this. I love this so much. I come to this work as your facilitator, you say. Someone who has experienced living with a full heart, living a busy life with a neglected heart, going through the deep sea diving of living with a broken heart and tenderly and compassionately healing my heart. Why did you need to heal your own heart. First of all, I want to say thank you, Oprah, for having me.
This is so wonderful and something I have been looking forward to being able to share this work with the public because many of us are walking around with broken hearts. And I like to say my understanding of healing my heart is not just from doctoral studies or reading books, but having lived it so to know firsthand that it's possible to heal our hearts. The first way I would say my heart was broken is something I know you can relate to, the realities of racism and sexism that cause us to not see our own beauty. And so to be broken hearted as a chocolate girl in Baltimore, to not be able to see the full glory of who I am. And so I had to heal my sense of myself because of all of the messages that bombard us very early to say that we're not enough.
And then moving further along, while I was in high school, my father was elected to be a bishop in the AME Church.
Can I just stop everybody right now? Because I have known you since you were a little girl. That's right. Because Bethel AME Church, y'all, in Baltimore. was the center of our, not just the city, but the spiritual culture for the city. That's right. And when I first moved from my father's house in Nashville and moved to Baltimore, the first thing he said to me was, find yourself a church home. And Bethel became my church home. And I used to sit in, I used to come to 8 o'clock service. That's right. Because you couldn't get in at 11 o'clock service. I used to drive all the way from Columbia, Maryland. And I would be mesmerized by your father and your mother. Yeah. Yes. And your mother. Thank you.
Thank you so much. And you were just an itty bitty. I was a little bitty. That's why like seven, eight years old seeing you and we would see you on the news. Yes. And then see you at church, which is such a great example for us to know what's possible. Wow. That this reflection is more than attainable.
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