BEST OF: This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von 2024

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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von 59 min 20 speakers 8 chapters transcribed
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What are the new initiatives by the New York Mayor?

Theo Von 0:00
Oh, do you see that thing with the mayor? Do you see that thing with the mayor of New York? No. Oh, dude. Oh, yeah, this is it right here. Do you see this? So Eric Adams, he teaches. What was he saying? They're teaching kids how to.

How can parents find hidden items in children's rooms?

Theo Von 0:13
They're teaching parents how to search your kid's room to find drugs and gun stuff.
Nick 0:17
You can look at a jewelry box, a jewelry box of this nature, maybe a simple jewelry box, but if you look through it closely, you don't know what your child may be hiding. For instance, a gun. That's from the state of New York. The fucking government was like, make it scary as fuck. Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Theo Von 0:34
Start it over.
Riley 0:35
Yeah, that music is crazy. You're gonna scare the fuck out of these people.
Theo Von 0:40
It's like, it almost seems like the story before Castlevania starts, like on a video game.
Nick 0:46
You can look at a jewelry box, a jewelry box of this nature.
Theo Von 0:47
Yeah, this is the opening menu. Yeah.
Nick 1:04
This is a video game.

What funny experiences do DoorDash drivers encounter?

Riley 1:06
That's where you find bullets in video games.
Nick 1:09
Look through his knapsack.
Theo Von 1:11
You might find a grenade.
Nick 1:13
In addition to a book. Something simple as a crack pipe. Something simple as a baby doll. What grade is a kid? But also it could be a place where you could secrete or hide drugs. Secrete. You could secrete. Bro, this is the mayor. Like a pillow like this with a button is a perfect invitation to hide something. I felt something bumpy. I would reach in, see what it is.
Theo Von 1:40
God only knows. I'll tell you this, man. Those DoorDash people see some shit. Oh, God, dude. You know, in India, they have a cast of people called the Untouchables. Do they really? Yes. You just can't fuck with them. Wow. You can't go near them. You see them, and you look away. Uh-uh. That is kind of. Don't take offense to this. But it is when I encounter a food delivery person in the wild, I look away. No. I will look away. Tim, you don't feel like you're one of them? A food delivery person? No. Yeah. There's so many other jobs. I just feel like if you're delivering DoorDash, I just inherently... Here's the thing. I love them as a person. They're a child of God. Yeah. But they're in so much pain. A lot of times you can see they're in pain. I can't see. Really? They're just listening to Scott Stapp usually. I don't feel like. I think some of them are in pain. They're just, it's tough.

What happened during the Super Bowl that affected Riley's love life?

Theo Von 2:43
It's a hard, I just, it's hard for me to see and look at. It's just hard for me to look at. And we got a love fella in the house today, Riley Mao. How are you, brother? Doing well. Have you blasted that corn stalk yet? You popped that corn stalk or what's going on with you, daddy? How's the love life, Bubba? Get us the latest, man.
Nick 3:05
Well, I almost had something happen yesterday. No. Yep. It was during the Super Bowl. A friend of mine invited me.
Theo Von 3:13
Okay.

How do people react to unexpected encounters in bars?

Nick 3:14
And we were hanging out and everything was great. And this other guy shows up.
Theo Von 3:20
No, so you met up with the girl?
Nick 3:22
No, yeah, we were just at a bar. Okay, you're at a bar. And a dude showed up? Yeah.
Theo Von 3:29
No. Uh-uh.
Nick 3:36
And what was he wearing? Was he dressed pretty well? He just had slacks on and a nice jacket. Fuck him.
Theo Von 3:44
I mean, that's... Did he know that you were there with her? yeah oh so he rode in right and um okay so he shows up now what do you do are you posturing a little or what happened are you um i'm just chilling you know i'm sitting next to her and everything's going great um and i get up to use the bathroom and once i get back he's normal dude gonna make toilet that's normal go on and uh he's in my seat next to her What the F? A white guy?
Nick 4:20
No.
Theo Von 4:21
Wow.
Nick 4:24
Wow. A mixed guy? Yeah, more darker. Okay.
Theo Von 4:32
A lot of the black girls in our town and stuff would get knocked up by the black guys at a young age. Yeah. So all of our black girls disappeared at around 13 years old and got pregnant. Yeah. And then they come back and they're just different or they just like, yeah, they have a child now or they have like baby milk on their shoulder or whatever.
Nick 4:53
Yeah.
Theo Von 4:55
Like they were just more advanced. Like the black kids in our school were more sexually advanced. They just had sex earlier and stuff. So I think that was intimidating. The black girls were intimidating because they had more experience. Yeah, it's funny.

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