Trump’s Trade Wars Hike Prices, GOP Blames Biden for Economy | Mae Martin
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You're listening to Comedy Central. From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Central, it's America's only source for news. This is The Daily Show with your host, Michael Kosta.
I'm Michael Kosta. Donald Trump just wrapped up his joint address to Congress, and we'll have full coverage on that tomorrow. But tonight, Republicans want to start cleaning up chicken shit. Joe Biden crop-dusted the economy on his way out, and relations with Canada are about to get ugly. But first, our ongoing segment, the second coming of Donald J. Trump. Donald Trump has been busy. In the past couple of days, he's switched sides in the war in Ukraine, announced a national crypto reserve, and dismantled the National Weather Service, because part of the fun of experiencing a Category 5 hurricane is the surprise. Trump's been so busy that I was getting worried he'd forgotten his plan to start a North American trade war. But my boy, he put it on the cow.
We begin with the breaking news in America's escalating trade war, and it's dramatic.
A global trade war kicked off at the stroke of midnight. President Trump's 25% tariffs on Canada and Mexico are now in effect.
Yeah, that's right, baby. Trade war. Nobody does war better than USA. USA. USA. That's right. Canada and Mexico are about to feel the pain. And the best part is, it's not going to affect us at all.
The average American household could spend up to $2,000 more a year on everything from produce to clothes to new cars. Driving up the cost of a small car by an estimated $6,200 or an SUV by $9,000. We're launching a trade war and it's going to affect us?
I'm going to pay $9,000 more for a Kia Sorento? Now I finally get why they say war is hell. So that's what Private Ryan, that's what Saving Private Ryan was all about. Private Ryan was a different movie. Isn't this the opposite of what Trump campaigned on? Raising prices on everything? I'm already buying my eggs and installments with Klarna. And the solution that his secretary of agriculture came up with, it's not very helpful.
I think the silver lining in all of this is how do we in our backyards, we've got chickens in our backyard, how do we solve for something like this? And people are sort of looking around thinking, wow, well, maybe I could get a chicken in my backyard. And it's awesome. I agree with you.
Yeah, I think everyone who isn't a farmer right now wants to be.
Yes. Great idea. Great idea. In this time of uncertainty, the one thing I need now is a wild animal in my house pecking my dick while I'm trying to make a frittata. Everybody who's not a farmer wants to be. Are you kidding me? Americans don't even go to grocery stores anymore. We just text get Cheerios to strangers on Instacart. But sure, I guess I'll become a small farmer. And hey, why stop at chickens? You know, I could grow my own avocados. I could raise my own cows. Wait, why am I buying my steel like a sucker when I could be smelting iron ore in my own bathtub? Either way, prices are about to go up. And I just hope that no one told that to the stock market. The stock market drops for a second day in a row now that President Trump's tariffs are in effect.
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