Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura
Tom Has Some BAD THOUGHTS | Your Mom's House Ep. 808
Wed, 30 Apr 2025
Get tickets for Tom’s Come Together Tour at https://tomsegura.com/tour Don't miss Tom Segura's new sketch comedy series "Bad Thoughts" premiering on Netflix May 13th! SPONSORS: Learn more about Lightstrike at https://Drinklightstrike.com or follow on TikTok and Instagram @drinklightstrike. You can find Cremo’s new line of antiperspirants and deodorants at Target or https://Target.com Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at https://shopify.com/momshouse Get 20% off your first order of Liquid I.V. when you go to http://LIQUIDIV.COM and use code YMH at checkout. Hey Jeans! This week on Your Mom’s House, Tom and Christina are back from Fantasy Island and the Mommies kick things off with a classic opening clip that'll have you saying, "What?!"They catch up on Tony Johns’ latest adventures — including his Vegas sex scene and current courtroom drama — plus a surprise call from RPC where he seems down to drop everything and join the Vegas fun! Next, Tom drops the trailer for his brand-new Netflix show and debuts it for the all the Mommies first. Tim and Kirsten also weigh in on Mick Jagger’s wedding, Keanu’s appropriately aged girlfriend, Gwyneth Paltrow’s face situation, and why taking care of yourself before you're too old is the move. They next go down a TikTok rabbit hole which includes bad haircuts, buffets, secret menu items, portal jumping, Little Debbie honey buns, and fat-shaming in Thailand. All this, plus some music dreams, rougey cocktails, underage drinking nostalgia, lipstick plugs, and a whole lot of gay corn jokes. Pull those jeans up! Your Mom’s House Ep. 808 https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:02:54 - Fantasy Island 00:09:49 - Opening Clip: WHAT?! 00:14:50 - Tony Johns + RPC Collab? 00:29:33 - YMH Exclusive: Bad Thoughts Full Trailer Premiere 00:35:46 - Lipstick Plug & Greased Up 00:37:55 - Mick Jagger Got Married 00:42:19 - Taking Care Of Yourself 00:48:22 - Clip: Ms. Pat Asks Trick Daddy About Diddy 00:49:32 - Clip: Black Light Daddy Pop Star 00:53:25 - Adult Beverages 01:01:47 - Christina's Curations 01:15:09 - Closing Song - "Any C*m In Those Balls" by TPK Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Chapter 1: What are the highlights from Tom's Come Together Tour?
What's up, everybody? My Come Together tour is coming to the Vibrant Arena in Moline, Illinois on May 8th, Bristol, Virginia at the Hard Rock on May 10th, and then Springfield, Massachusetts at the Mass Mutual Center on May 22nd. Get tickets now at tomscrow.com slash tour.
It's sexy.
Chapter 2: What happened on Fantasy Island?
Best song ever made.
Really cool one.
I wish we could have played that at our wedding, but it wasn't made yet.
It wasn't made yet. Jeans and Mike were going to hit.
Jeans and Mike. Even the title on that was a banger.
It's really exciting, man.
Jeans and Mike.
I remember the clip, too. I remember the clip that she was bound and her head was through one of those things and her... Her arms and legs were bound also.
That old-timey torture in the middle of the town square. What is it called, you guys? Stocks.
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Chapter 3: What are Tony Johns' latest adventures?
Sexy.
Sexy.
It can't be that comfortable to be in the stock.
She didn't look comfortable.
No, this seems like a very common fantasy, though.
Yeah.
This one makes, it's like intuitive. Not the standing one, obviously, but, you know.
No, yeah, somebody just that can't fight back, you mean? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
I feel like they probably did have just open on people in the stocks, right? I'm sure. I never read about it.
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Chapter 4: What is the full trailer for Bad Thoughts about?
No, not this shit.
See, this is when three years between us makes a difference.
Yeah.
But anyway. Mom and I, Saturday night, Fantasy Island. The point of the story is there's a couple that comes to the island and they're like, Mr. Rourke, our fantasy is to live in a more moral time. They don't want to live in the depravity that was 1980. Oh my God. And Mr. Rourke gives them a warning like, You may not enjoy it so much as you think. It might be a little different than you expect.
So they're back to puritanical times. They create a village. It's so expensive to go to Fantasy Island. First of all, I don't know how these people are affording it because it's a whole thing.
This little fucker was a real rascal. You know that, right? Hold on.
Can I tell you the point?
Yeah.
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Chapter 5: How did Mick Jagger's wedding go?
So they go back to puritanical times and they're putting people in the stocks and punishing them and then they decide they don't want any puritans anymore.
That era is... Because life sucks. Molto gay. Yes.
It fucking sucks.
Mm-hmm.
And you just... people and just take away... Got it.
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Chapter 6: What are tips for taking care of yourself as you age?
You've said it a few times.
Hold on. There's a priest in the town and he... This girl got married when she was 13 and then her husband died at 15 and she's 15 and he wants to bang her and it's so awful.
Okay. Yeah. Yeah, but these guys were... These two were both knuckleheads. You know that, right?
I feel like Ricardo Montalban... could not not get laid. Because he's so smooth and so handsome.
But the little guy, the little guy was a fiery little fucker.
No, you don't know that.
Yeah, there's a lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Drinking, guns. Yeah, he was a little shit. Yeah.
You know, the LPs kind of do that. The ones in showbiz. Yeah. Yeah, they party. They can party.
mm-hmm we just had one here we did brad but brad's not a big part you know why they can't he was a big party guy but they can't because their bodies can't really they still party dude drink alcohols he used to party pretty hard i know so did chewy bravo but this guy i think he had a mean streak this guy seriously can you find any it's like footage of him yelling at people any hervey village has stories
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Chapter 7: What are some highlights of the new Netflix show?
Trust me.
Yeah, I know what you mean. I call her Gwena.
Right.
But I was only afraid of that. We won't get into that.
Yeah, so you're working on that bit. That's fun.
Yeah.
Hey, I got a question for you. What? So we are producing a doc and then working with some people for an adult scene that's shooting in Vegas. It's big names, you know, Alexis Fox. It's like the breakout role for Tony Johns. Would you be interested in being in a scene like that? What kind of scene? It's an adult scene, like a porno.
I would do it. Yes.
So here's what I'm thinking. Yes. I'm thinking. Oh, yes. Right now, we're going the law enforcement angle. So Alexis. Creatively. Yeah, creatively. Yeah, yeah. So she's going to play Officer Alexis. And then Tony Johns is the male who's been arrested. And we were thinking you could be like basically Sergeant Cumdump.
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