You Love & You Learn Podcast
Episodes
#133 - Healing Anxiety Beyond Talk Therapy with Tori Lutz
09 Jun 2026
Contributed by Lukas
This week, I'm joined by Tori Lutz, a spinal energetics practitioner and a transformational mindset & somatic coach who spent two decades in t...
#132 - Do I Still Have Relationship Anxiety? (My Honest Answer)
19 May 2026
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome back!!! 💓 It feels really meaningful to be here again after taking some time away.In this episode, I’m sharing a bit of a life and identi...
#131 - Building Real Wealth Through Our Relationships w/ Sahil Bloom
30 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This week, I’m joined by New York Times bestselling author, entrepreneur, and investor, Sahil Bloom, as he shares the life-changing insights behind ...
#130 - I didn't realize how often I stuffed down my real feelings until now...
23 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this video, I share the 3 patterns I realized were holding me back, and how I’ve been working to reset them during Week 4 of The Artist’s Way (...
#129 - Navigating shame and criticism in healthier ways
16 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
I’m back for a (slightly delayed) recap of the Artist’s Way Chapter 3 - Recovering a Sense of Power. And to get your power back, Julia Cameron tal...
#128 - To Feel More Fulfilled, We Must Release Skepticism and Self-Doubt
09 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Week two explores self-doubt and skepticism as big blocks to living a more creative + fulfilling life, the dangers of surrounding ourselves with peopl...
#127 - Why We Stay Blocked (Even When We Say We Want Change)
02 Sep 2025
Contributed by Lukas
I’m back with a recap of Week 1 of The Artist’s Way sharing my key takeaways that go far beyond creativity. This isn’t a book summary, it’s sh...
#126 - When It’s Time to Expand… Even If It’s Scary
26 Aug 2025
Contributed by Lukas
After 5 years of building You Love and You Learn and focusing primarily on relationship anxiety... I’m feeling a pull I can’t ignore any longer! A...
#125 - Becoming the Most Honest Version of Yourself with Survivor 48’s Shauhin Davari
15 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is an honest look at what it means to find your voice and show up authentically in life, relationships, and even on national television. ...
#124 - The Love You Give Becomes the Love You Get
01 Jul 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This episode is an open-hearted reflection on what the quote “The love I give becomes the love I get” brought up for me, and how it inspired the c...
#123 - Letting Go of Who You Think You “Should” Be with Mollie Birney
17 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, I’m joined by Clinical Life Coach & Consultant and former therapist Mollie Birney to discuss the role identity plays in all asp...
#122 - Navigating Motherhood with Anxious & OCD Tendencies with Kiyomi LaFleur
03 Jun 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this heartfelt episode, I sit down with returning guest Kiyomi, with Awaken Into Love, to talk about her journey into motherhood and the powerful i...
#121 - Throwback Episode: “Am I ‘In Love’, or Do I Just Love Them?”
20 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Bringing back an oldie but goodie episode this week! Whether you’re hearing it for the first time, or if you heard it when it first aired back in Ma...
#120 - It’s Wedding Week! My Reflections and Intentions Before the Big Day
06 May 2025
Contributed by Lukas
It's officially wedding week! 🎉💍 In this episode, I’m taking you behind the scenes of my wedding season — from setting intentions before my ...
#119 - Throwback Episode: Relationships Force Us to Answer Life’s Big Questions
29 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Bringing back an oldie but goodie episode this week! Whether you’re hearing it for the first time, or if you heard it when it first aired back in Fe...
#118 - Releasing Intensity in Relationships and Career
22 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this solo episode, I’m sharing what it’s looked like to reduce the pressure and urgency I used to bring into two major areas of my life: my rel...
#117 - Getting Your Spark Back with Anna Seirian
15 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
This week on the podcast I have on Anna Seirian, a writer and coach for ADHD women who want to trade exhaustion and survival for ease and pleasure. Sh...
#116 - Letting Go of the Need for Certainty in Relationships w/ My Client
08 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
I am so grateful to bring on another former client of mine to discuss her transformative journey with relationship anxiety. In this episode we explore...
#115 - Transform Your Relationship with Your Body, Not Your Mind with Becky Aste
01 Apr 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever felt stuck in the same relationship patterns, no matter how hard you try to change? This week, I sat down with trauma-informed marriage ...
#114 - The Impact of Alcohol in Relationships
25 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, I’m exploring a topic that can sometimes feel a little uncomfy—but is super important to talk about: the role alcohol plays in ro...
#113 - The Messy Middle: Navigating Life’s Uncertain Seasons
18 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
The Messy Middle — a space we all find ourselves in at some point. It’s that uncomfortable, uncertain period where things feel unclear, and we’r...
#112 - How to Stop Overthinking and Create Safety From Within With Samantha Chung
11 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, I sit down with life and manifestation coach, Samantha Chung, to explore how to overcome anxiety, relinquish control, and create inne...
#111 - The Journey to Better Sex with Sex Expert Susan Bratton
04 Mar 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Ready for a real conversation about sex? This week, I'm joined by sex expert Susan Bratton to explore the path to a more fulfilling sex life. We unpac...
#110 - Why Your Brain Wants to Run in Relationships w/ Robert James
25 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
I know many listeners have felt the urge to escape a perfectly good relationship. This can show up as questioning if you're making a mistake, if you'r...
#109 - Throwback Episode: 5 Ways to Respond When Anxiety Shows Up
18 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Bringing back an oldie but goodie episode this week! Whether you’re hearing it for the first time, or if you heard it when it first aired back in Fe...
#108 - Throwback Episode: “Am I in the ‘Right Relationship?”
11 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Bringing back an oldie but goodie episode this week! Whether you’re hearing it for the first time, or if you heard it when it first aired back in Ja...
#107 - Stop Outsourcing Your Happiness
04 Feb 2025
Contributed by Lukas
We are heading into Valentine's Day month and there will be a ton of messages about having your romantic partner meeting your needs and showering you ...
#106 - Comparison to Fictional Relationships and RomComs
28 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Reading fiction can be relaxing–unless we’re stuck comparing our lives and relationship to the ones in the books! Then it can become stressful. Ju...
#105 - Regulating Your Nervous System by Slowing and Softening w/ Alena Winter
21 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
In today’s episode, I sat down with Alena Winter, a clinical Naturopath and Nutritionist in New Zealand who is passionate about helping people under...
#104 - Taking the Pressure Off Gratitude w/ Karden Rabin
14 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever felt pressure to “just be grateful”? Maybe you have sat down to write a gratitude list before, but it took you a while to think of t...
#103 - Strengthening Your Relationship Mindset in 2025
07 Jan 2025
Contributed by Lukas
Having a strong mindset in relationships can be a big game-changer. Our mindset affects the way we think, feel, and behave–so it makes a big differe...
#102 - 8 Lessons From My 8-Year Relationship
17 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Nate and I celebrated 8 years together yesterday, and I wanted to take some time to reflect on what I’ve learned in our time together. The 8 lessons...
#101 - Overcoming Relationship Anxiety w/ Courtney Paré
10 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
I am so excited to bring you this conversation with Dr. Courtney Paré, a licensed naturopathic doctor, holistic anxiety coach, speaker, and author. C...
#100 - The Love We’ve Learned from 100(!!) Episodes
03 Dec 2024
Contributed by Lukas
I can’t believe we’re already at episode 100 of this podcast! After sitting down with 50 guests, there were many lessons learned about love that I...
#99 - Lessons from Being in Limbo w/ Ela Topcuoglu
26 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode I am back with past guest, Ela Topcuoglu, who is a Life Transition Coach that helps us intentionally move through life’s big milesto...
#98 - Uncovering Inner Peace w/ Lily Sais of @peacefromwithin
19 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, I sit down with Lily Sais, a former school psychologist turned registered Three Principles practitioner, whose journey has taken her ...
#97 - My Recurring Relationship Anxiety ‘Theme’
12 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Over the years, there is a recurring ‘theme’ that brings up discomfort for me within my relationship, and that is when things feel boring or munda...
#96 - Signs of an Abusive Relationship w/ Dr. Molly Burrets
05 Nov 2024
Contributed by Lukas
This is a long overdue episode to explore signs of what an abusive relationship is and isn’t. I often give the disclaimer “my work does not apply ...
#95 - "When You Know, You Know"
29 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, I unpack the phrase “when you know you know” and how I used to take this phrase very literally, which caused a lot of anxiety and...
#94 - Why You’re Unhappy, and What Can Make You Happier w/ Stephanie Harrison
22 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Does it feel like you’re doing all the ‘right’ things but you’re still not happy? Does it feel like everyone around you seems to be happier th...
#93 - Why Lowering the Bar May Actually Be a (Really) Good Thing w/ MJ Mayes
15 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, MJ and I discuss why lowering the bar in your life and relationship might actually be a good thing. No, this isn’t about settling o...
#92 - A New Mindset Towards Anxiety
08 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, I explore the common struggle of wanting anxiety to disappear and how this often makes the anxiety feel even stronger. Many people as...
#91 - When You Want to Stay in Your Relationship, But Wish Things Were Better
01 Oct 2024
Contributed by Lukas
I’ve never done this before, but today I am bringing you a training from my Patreon membership to the podcast to show you a peek into the types of t...
#90 - Embracing a Partner Who’s Different From You w/ Chelsea Horton
24 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, Chelsea and I dive into the idea that true relationship strength often comes from embracing differences rather than being exactly the...
#89 - 5 Tips When You Feel Disconnected From Your Partner
17 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
It can feel so painful to be disconnected from your partner. I get it, because I’ve had a few of these moments myself recently! Let’s talk about i...
#88 - Healing From the Inside Out w/ Alison Seponara
10 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
This episode focuses on healing anxiety from the inside out. And who better to speak to than Alison Seponara – therapist, anxiety educator, holistic...
#87 - Why You’re Triggered by Your Partner w/ Thais Gibson
03 Sep 2024
Contributed by Lukas
You are in for a TREAT with this episode, which truly felt like a therapy session for me. I sat down with Thais Gibson who has over a decade working a...
#86 - The Realities of Healing Relationship Anxiety
27 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever felt like you were not going “fast enough” in your journey to heal relationship anxiety or ROCD? Maybe you’ve seen other people sh...
#85 - How to Help Someone w/ Relationship Anxiety + ROCD
20 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
If you are the partner of someone with relationship anxiety, this episode is for you. If you have relationship anxiety and want to be able to a...
#84 - Why We Sabotage Healthy Relationships w/ Dr. Morgan Anderson
13 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
If you have ever felt like your healthy relationship is boring and the “vibes are off” – this episode is for you! I sat down with Dr. Morgan And...
#83 - Taking Our Partner Off The Pedestal w/ Charisse Cooke
06 Aug 2024
Contributed by Lukas
I loved this conversation because time and time again this comes up in the work I do with clients (and it was a pattern in my own relationship). I sat...
#82 - How to Make Room for More Joy
30 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Do you ever notice yourself feeling good, then suddenly an anxious voice pops up saying “wait, shouldn’t I be worrying about something?” or “i...
#81 - Staying Grounded During Wedding Planning
23 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, I share my personal journey from getting engaged (June 2023) to planning my wedding (in May 2025). Thanks to great questions from the...
#80 - Part 2: Setting Boundaries with In-Laws w/ Alexandra Schelling
16 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
You asked…we’re answering! Alexandra Schelling (of @toolboxforlove on Instagram) and I polled our communities for questions about navigating our s...
#79 - Part 1: Navigating Family Dynamics: Expectations vs. Reality w/ Alexandra Schelling
09 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
You asked…we’re answering! Alexandra Schelling (of @toolboxforlove on Instagram) and I polled our communities for questions about navigating our s...
#78 - From Burnout to Balance: Cycle Syncing w/ Ash McDonald
02 Jul 2024
Contributed by Lukas
his episode is a long-time coming, one I have been so excited to record and share with you because I wish more people knew this information! Menstrual...
#77 - Helpful Advice From a Divorce Lawyer
25 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
I was pleasantly surprised when I listened to a podcast with James Sexton, a divorce lawyer who’s seen the ups and downs of couples for 25+ years in...
#76 - A Reframe to Help Relationship Anxiety: Zooming In and Out
18 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
This simple reframe has helped me (and dozens of my clients) in moments of relationship anxiety: zooming in when you’re thinking too big-picture, an...
#75 - Healing Unworthiness: From Trauma to Self-Worth w/ Sarah Baldwin
11 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
This topic is LONG overdue, and that is feeling unworthy and how this affects our life and the ways we show up in our relationships. I’m thrilled to...
#74 - Speaking Up For Your Needs in a Relationship w/ Gayane Aramyan
04 Jun 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Are you clear about what your needs are in a relationship? If so, do you communicate them openly with your partner? If you answered no to either...
#73 - What if I've Had Relationship Anxiety/ROCD from the Beginning
28 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Common questions I am asked are “what if I never had a honeymoon phase?” and “is it bad if I’ve had relationship anxiety/ROCD from the beginni...
#72 - Is it Normal For Healthy Love to Feel Boring?
21 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever felt bored in your relationship and worried that something is wrong? Maybe you’ve wondered “is this normal, shouldn’t things feel ...
#71 - Trusting Your Intuition in Your First Serious Relationship w/ my client
14 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
It can be so hard to trust ourselves when there is so much relationship information and advice out there. Even well-meaning friends and family can add...
#70 - Healing Anxiety Through Nervous System Regulation w/ Amanda Armstrong
07 May 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Today we’re diving into something that has a big impact on our overall mental health and wellbeing; our vagus nerve. Amanda Armstrong, neuroscience ...
#69 - If My Relationship Isn't Easy, Am I Forcing It?
30 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, I address advice like “a relationship should feel mostly positive / easy / joyful in order to be worth it”, and “if the balance...
#68 - Build Healthy Realtionship Habits w/ Gottman Method Therapist Anna Aslanian
23 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
There is so much to learn from the Gottman Method of therapy, which is based on 40+ years of relationship research thanks to the work of John and Juli...
#67 - The Unintended Consequences of Healing
16 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
‘Healing’ and growth are usually looked at as good things. But what happens when it becomes something we’re doing to try and be perfect and fix ...
#66 - 5 Signs of Perfectionism in Relationships (and Life) w/ Kayla Licari
09 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Perfectionism has been a big theme on the podcast, but it’s sooooo needed! I truly think perfectionism is one of the biggest impacts on how we show ...
#65 - Mastering Your Mind Drama w/ Rebecca Ore
02 Apr 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Does it ever feel like your mind just won’t stop throwing thoughts at you? In this episode, I sit down with relationship coach Rebecca Ore to talk a...
#64 - Relationships Are Big Opportunities to 'Look in the Mirror'
26 Mar 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Our partners and relationships are constantly reflecting things back to us, and if we’re willing to ‘look in the mirror’ we can learn so much. O...
#63 - From Triggered to Trusting Yourself w/ McKell Kristen
19 Mar 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Do you feel like you’re constantly comparing your relationship to others around you? Maybe you see a couple break up then worry you’re doomed to b...
#62 - The "I'll Be Happy When..." Trap in Relationships
12 Mar 2024
Contributed by Lukas
I’ll be happy when… I find The One my anxiety goes away my partner acts this way my partner looks just right my feelings are what I expect them to...
#61 - Cultivating Self-Compassion w/ Dr. Kristin Neff
05 Mar 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode I got to sit down with Kristin Neff, a pioneer in self-compassion research who has been recognized as one of the most influential rese...
#60 - Taking Ownership for Relationship Anxiety w/ my client
27 Feb 2024
Contributed by Lukas
A lot of times in our relationships, it’s easy to look at our partner and notice all the things they could be doing better. “It’s you, not me.”...
#59 - Sex, Anxiety, and Sex Anxiety
20 Feb 2024
Contributed by Lukas
If our sex life doesn’t match the steamy scenes from the movies, it can bring up a lot of anxiety: “am I with the right partner sexually?” “ar...
#58 - 5 Life-Changing Relationship Rules w/ Kimberley Quinlan
13 Feb 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, I talk with Kimberley Quinlan, LMFT, about 5 relationship rules that changed her life. She’s been married for 20 years and has so m...
#57 - "Do I Stay, or Do I Go?"
06 Feb 2024
Contributed by Lukas
“Do I stay or go?” “How do I know if a relationship is worth saving?” These are not-so-simple questions to answer, and can cause a lot of disc...
#56 - "Are We Too Different?"
30 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever wondered if you and your partner are too different? Too many personality clashes? “How will this ever work?” In today’s epi...
#55 - The Gifts of Long Distance Relationships w/Hannah of @healingwithhan__
23 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Long distance relationships can be very challenging, especially if you’re getting pressure from external sources. “When are you going to be living...
#54 - Jealous About Your Partner's Past? w/ Eva Thompson
16 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever been jealous (or extremely jealous) of your partner’s past? Perhaps you’ve ruminated on their ex’s, asked them questions about the...
#53 - Comparison in Relationships
09 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
Do you tend to compare your relationship to others a lot? Does it make you feel like your relationship isn’t up to par? I’m right there with ya—...
#52 - Leaning into Discomfort in Your Relationship w/ Robert James
02 Jan 2024
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode, I sit down with Robert James, an OCD & anxiety coach who having spent years struggling with OCD, finally learned to overcome &...
#51 - 6 Ways to Manage Relationship Impostor Syndrome
26 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Do you ever worry that other people will discover that your relationship isn’t as shiny and perfect as they think it is? Or that you’ll somehow be...
#50 - How Default Survival Responses Affect Relationships w/ Amanda Armstrong
19 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode I got to sit down with Amanda Armstrong who is a neuroscience and trauma-informed anxiety & depression coach. Amanda helped share ...
#49 - Let Go of Controlling Habits in Your Relationship w/ Natalie of @anxiouslovecoach
12 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
One of the most challenging things to practice in relationships (and life) is releasing control of things that are not in our control. And one thing t...
#48 - Behind-the-Scenes of My Life and Relationship Amidst a Transitional Time
05 Dec 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this solo episode I’m sharing 7 reflections that have come up (or revisited my consciousness) over the last few months since moving home from Swe...
#47 - Should You Tell Your Partner About Relationship Anxiety?
28 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Should you tell your partner about your relationship anxiety? If so, how? I’m often asked questions like: "How much should you disclose about your r...
#46 - Do God/The Universe Give Signs About Your Relationship?
21 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this week’s episode I got to sit down with a married couple who each experienced their own versions of relationship anxiety and are now married f...
#45 - Making Your Relationship Work w/ Mallory of @makemarriagework
14 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
I sat down with Mallory, a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist and 1/2 of @makemarriagework to talk about what it takes to make a relationship wo...
#44 - Will I Suffer With Relationship Anxiety/ROCD Forever? w/ Christine
07 Nov 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Very grateful to bring you another conversation with a private coaching client of mine, Christine. These conversations are so important for me because...
#43 - 7 Ways to Reduce Perfectionism In Our Relationships
31 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Welcome back for part 2 of this 2-part series on perfectionism in our relationships. Be sure to check out episode #42 before diving into this one! In ...
#42 - How Perfectionism + Expectations Affect Relationships
24 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Do you often feel disappointed in your relationship (or life) when things don’t go how you expect they will? Do you have very specific ideas of how ...
#41 - Creating a Safe Space for Your Partner w/ Alexis
17 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
I’m SO excited to bring you this conversation with Alexis, a past private coaching client. We worked together almost 3 years ago, and yet Alexis con...
#40 - Should You Set Social Media Boundaries w/ Your Partner? (& other popular questions)
10 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this special guest interview episode, I join actor and YouTube host Kate Easton for a conversation about relationship anxiety. She interviews me an...
#39 - Why Do I Think About My Ex? w/ Lindsay O’Brien
03 Oct 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever thought about an ex while in your healthy relationship? (maybe even an ex you’d been in an unhealthy relationship with?) In today’s ...
#38 - What Does it Mean to be Two-Feet-In a Relationship?
26 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
In this episode I answer a question from a You Love and You Learn community member: “you’ve mentioned something along the lines of ‘choosing to ...
#37 - Is your Relationship Healthy? w/ Dr. Molly Burrets
19 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Have you ever questioned if your relationship is healthy or healthy “enough”? In this conversation with Dr. Molly Burrets we explore: what it mea...
#36 - Communication, Conflict, and Connection w/ Jocelyn and Aaron Freeman
12 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Strengthening communication, navigating conflict, and deepening connection are 3 important pillars of a healthy relationship. I got the chance to chat...
#35 - Is Your Relationship Boring, or Are You?
05 Sep 2023
Contributed by Lukas
Do relationships inevitably become boring after the “honeymoon phase” ends? If we’re feeling bored in our relationship—is that a sign somethin...
#34 - Becoming More Securely Attached w/ Elizabeth Gillette
29 Aug 2023
Contributed by Lukas
With all the buzz of attachment theory, it’s easy to think being securely attached is “better” and being insecurely attached is “worse.” But...